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For every lady who has ever had her broken 💟

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Sat May 16, 2020 8:58 pm

Sun May 17, 2020 8:04 am

Hello Summerfan.

Thank you for this beautiful sentiment, which can agree with and applaud. Unfortunately, there are some people (whom I have labelled as 'bullys') who view fragile and delicate as being a weakness to be exploited and abused.

Although I have now finished my 4th book on bullying, ther will no doubt be a follow-up at some time in the future. So, thank you for the concept, which has motivated the rhyme below:

Best wishes

Bill

AN ABUSED HEART.

When I gave my heart to you,
it was not for you to screw,
by the playing of your games
or furthering your selfish aims.

At first, it’s undeniable,
that then, you seemed reliable,
adorable, responsible,
and thus, we seemed compatible.

Back then, I thought I could expect
kindness, love, mutual respect,
for these were things you shared with me
and this is how it seemed to be.

In those days, when first we met,
this is what I thought we’d get,
with all those nice things that we shared,
which made it seem as if you cared.

These were the things that you implied,
until I found out that you lied,
and you had used that kindly cloak
‘because’ - you’re not that sort of bloke.

What I found out quite gradually,
was that you were a covert bully,
determined to get your own way
and thinking that ‘I’ was your prey.

The more you told me I was wrong,
the more you told me you were strong
and would win in any combat,
that’s when I knew, what you were at.

For a while, I was in denial,
thinking you should have a fair trial,
but now I know that’s a mistake
that most abused women will make.

There is one thing victims should know –
when once a bully, always so!

                                     B. Withers 2020

Sun May 17, 2020 8:13 am

Interesting sentiments expressed there. However, researchers have found that women are more often the dumpers rather than the dumpees and that " men never fully recover from losing the affection of women they truly love". So, as usual, there are two sides to the story and that includes broken relationships. In any case, it is all in fun, Summerfan. Incidentally, there is a Museum of Broken Relationships, brokenships.com. In their own words: " At its core, the Museum is an ever-growing collection of items, each a memento of a relationship past, accompanied by a personal, yet anonymous story of its contributor". It is located in many cities of the world, including New York and Los Angeles. No dearth of the broken-hearted it seems. Nice to know that the objects you send associated with your memories live on and the Museum looks after them. Best wishes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sun May 17, 2020 9:50 pm

Summerfan and bowsprit, I think you are both right. I know some of both women and men who have been shattered by break ups. I think some will move on eventually, but I also know some who never fully get over it. There are some people who think their partners will just be there even when they may be at fault. When they realize the grass is not greener on the other side as the saying goes they wish they had kept what they had.

Bill I like your poem it can be applied to men or women.

Stay safe

Mon May 18, 2020 9:47 am
lovely wrote:

Summerfan and bowsprit, I think you are both right. I know some of both women and men who have been shattered by break ups. I think some will move on eventually, but I also know some who never fully get over it. There are some people who think their partners will just be there even when they may be at fault. When they realize the grass is not greener on the other side as the saying goes they wish they had kept what they had.

Bill I like your poem it can be applied to men or women.

Stay safe

Well said, lovely. Thanks for bringing a sad subject to a satisfying conclusion. All the best wishes. 

Mon May 18, 2020 2:58 pm

Lovely usage of the word COVERT......

 

k

Mon May 18, 2020 4:34 pm

I didn't mean to imply anything other than to say that a woman's heart is a treasure,, I'm so sorry if it appears that I was trying to be a player. I've been on the receiving end of a broken heart and it's no fun as they say. 

 

Not to sound snappy to anyone, it's just I missed my lunch and my microwave is beeping at me because lunch is ready. 🙂

Tue May 19, 2020 4:08 am

Hello everyone.
Thanks for all your appreciative comments on the rhyme, I need this encouragement from time to time, as without them, I never really know how they poems are received by the readers. Also, some of the comments are very helpful in deciding how to word other (future) poems.
LOVELY: You are absolutely right, that the sentiments can apply to men and women. Unfortunately, when compiling rhyming verse, I sometimes have to choose one of the sexes to illustrate a point. In this case, the rhyme(s) are being written specifically for two women that I know, and am helping them through that difficult period of realisation that they are being abused by their spouses.

KSTYLE: I  am so pleased you appreciate the ‘chosen’ word. As explained above, at present I have been writing on behalf of two separate women who are having similar problems with their spouses. Both men are what I call ‘covert’ bullies. This is because to the outside world they present a façade of being highly respectable people. However, when they get behind the closed doors of the family home, they become monsters of abusive behaviour. They are clever, highly manipulative, and careful not to let any evidence of abuse be shown to others. Thus, the women tend not to be believed when they complain about these ‘lovely’ men.

SUMMERFAN: I think the caption you posted was a useful reminder of what many women feel about their emotional ‘hearts’, and, in that respect, it says nothing more or less than this. There seems to be no need to apologise for the caption, and I don’t know what being ‘a player’ means exactly, but I cannot see any reason to apologise for that either. I am so sorry to hear that you have had this sort of distressing experience as, like you say, it is "no fun".
In some weird ways, the trauma of a broken relationship has things in common with having a stoma, inasmuch as it is often unwanted, sneaks up as a surprise package, is emotionally distressing, and takes a lot of getting used to. However, with patience, practice, and perseverance, we can adjust to the ‘new-normal’ and get on with our lives, putting the traumatic-past behind us.
One of the things to be(a)ware of in this regard, is that traumas can make us emotionally sensitive to what might be perceived as emotional ‘knocks’. Thus, when someone makes a comment about us, we might perceive it as a reminder of past traumas and over-react. This is perfectly ‘normal’ and is equivalent to the ‘flashbacks’ in the condition known as PTSD. (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder).
It takes time and effort to build emotional confidence after a traumatic episode. Sometimes, some people also need the help and guidance of a friend, a fellow ‘sufferer’, or a professional to enable forward progress to be made. Fellow ‘sufferers’ with stomas, can often find that sort of help on a site such as this, because there are not many other people who truly understand what it is they are going through.
I am not aware of any similar sites for people who have been traumatised by relationship break-ups, but if there is such a thing, perhaps you could let me know and I will include it in my correspondence with others who are suffering in similar ways.
Best wishes
Bill

Tue May 19, 2020 4:18 am

Hello Bowsprit. 

Thanks for the heads-up regarding the Museum of Broken Relationships, (brokenships.com.)  I will definitely take a look at that, as it seems like a brilliant concept and would, no doubt, contain many ideas and motivations for new and pertinent rhyming verse. 

Best wishes

Bill

Tue May 19, 2020 11:38 am
Bill wrote:

Hello Bowsprit. 

Thanks for the heads-up regarding the Museum of Broken Relationships, (brokenships.com.)  I will definitely take a look at that, as it seems like a brilliant concept and would, no doubt, contain many ideas and motivations for new and pertinent rhyming verse. 

Best wishes

Bill

There is an entity like that. It owes its existence to a European couple that went through a broken relationship themselves. They were amazed at its worldwide success. I am sure you will do full justice to their efforts if you devote a few lines of rhyming verse to them. They bring to mind a Emily Dickinson poem :
If I can stop one heart from breaking,

I shall not live in vain

If I can ease one life the aching;

or cool one pain

or help one fainting robin

Unto his nest again

I shall not live in vain.

Tue May 19, 2020 12:22 pm
bowsprit wrote:

There is an entity like that. It owes its existence to a European couple that went through a broken relationship themselves. They were amazed at its worldwide success. I am sure you will do full justice to their efforts if you devote a few lines of rhyming verse to them. They bring to mind a Emily Dickinson poem :
If I can stop one heart from breaking,

I shall not live in vain

If I can ease one life the aching;

or cool one pain

or help one fainting robin

Unto his nest again

I shall not live in vain.

Hello Bowsprit. 

Whatt a lovely sentiment from Emily Dickenson. If only there were more people who could think like that!

I did have a brief look at Brokenships.com  and I'll dip into it again for inspiration when I have time. 

Best wishes

Bill

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