Any more shit ....?

Sorry guys, I have been neglecting you ..... for no other reason than I tend to go a bit quiet when things aren't right for me.

So what has happened since my surgery last September? Well, to begin with, that seems to have been a success - after 12 years and 9 failed attempts with infection after infection, this time I was in and out with no antibiotics, no infection, and no wound breakdown - seemed so weird after all the other trouble ...... had it MRI'd in January and am assuming that my fistula has now gone .... will get the results in 2 weeks' time when I go and discuss my next step with the new colo-rectal team.

Thing is, this next step will mean having the biggest surgery ever for me - a sternum to pelvis incision, repair of hernia, and either a reversal or resiting of a permanent ileostomy or colostomy. The problem being, I am just not feeling fit enough to go through with all that! My diabetes seems reasonably stable, but I am having bouts of very deep pelvic pain, which is now thought to be endometriosis - so another diagnosis to add to my list. I am also now on beta-blockers for high blood pressure and seem to have an abnormally high resting pulse. There are also days when I just cannot stay awake at all .... One of these days has been today - keep nodding off over my keyboard :(

The Fibromyalgia thing - which I am fairly sure I do not have, has yet to be diagnosed properly; I personally think it is probably a form of either Lupus or Scleroderma, but I need to see a Rheumatologist for that. My dentist thinks I have Sjögren's Syndrome and has referred me on to the Oral and Maxillofacial Dept, so yet another Dept for me to attend!

The MRI of my brain and spine showed degeneration in the cervical, thoracic, and lumbar areas (most of it then) with a number of bulging discs or tears in the lumbar area impinging on nerve roots giving me the sciatic pain, and there are changes to the foci in my brain ... not that I have had a referral back to the neurologist to explain any of this ..... but I know it has been my huge hernia that has caused it .....

My digestive system has also gone awry - I have started burping - evil-smelling and tasting burps that are fecal in origin ... people have been known to leave the room! That along with my hyperhidrosis - excessive sweating, has knocked my confidence again as I look awful when I go out with all my hair plastered to my head with sweat, and smell! Sorting these two needs to happen as I just feel so embarrassed going out now ... :(

Very shortly my government will be pronouncing me fit to go back to work - along with those who have terminal cancer, collapsed lungs, and folks with no sight or legs .... so that should be fun, finding me employment in a role where I can isolate myself in a cupboard to avoid other employees with a bed so that I can nap at regular intervals - maybe it would be easier to use the new euthanasia packs the Dept of Work and Pensions will be issuing shortly ..... do look at the links - scary in a funny sort of way!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsEWjsKOx08

http://www.healthscare.bigskycoast.com/Euthanasia%20Assistance%20Application.pdf

Will keep you posted when I know more .....

Rach xx