Today I Lost A Stoma-plug!
TODAY I LOST A STOMA PLUG.
For many years I’ve felt quite smug,
to wear a simple stoma plug,
and skip the inconvenience
of the stoma-bag experience.
Perhaps, for some, I should explain,
that I found bags could be a pain,
with all that emptying and stuff
and so, I’d quickly had enough.
I learned another way to go,
and switched to irrigation so
I ditched the bags that I had dread,
and wore a stoma-plug instead.
These stoma-plugs are what I’d pick,
because they’ve always done the trick,
by giving me freedom each day
to live my life a ‘normal’ way.
But today, a small disaster struck,
the plug came off and became stuck
deep down inside my stoma hole
and thus, I felt I’d lost control.
When problems such as this arise,
I just sit down and theorise
about how I can overcome
what’s happing in my tummy-bum.
If things are seemingly amiss,
there’s no point panicking, for this
will only add to the drama
and won’t resolve the dilemma.
Despite the fact it may cause harm,
the thing to do, is remain calm,
and contemplate what we can do
to solve the problem and pull through.
TODAY I LOST A STOMA PLUG. (-- continued)
I could have called the doctors and
try to make them understand
that these things can come as a shock,
as stoma plugs are meant to block.
But some doctors I’ve come across,
appear that they don’t give a toss
about what harm they’d bring about
whilst trying to get this thing out.
So, this is the main reason why
my preference is DIY,
when it comes down to rectify
those things I can objectify.
The stoma plug seems to have stuck,
within my bowel with other muck
that might, with patience, be propelled
by peristalsis and expelled.
But I would like to eject it
along with all the other shit.
So, why not try to irrigate
to help it circumnavigate.
But as I pour the water in
my mind, it starts a wonderin’,
if this procedure doesn’t work
the doctors will think I’m a burk. (fool)
As I am not the type of guy
to give up stuff before I try,
I continue irrigation
to achieve evacuation.
So, though I lost a plug today,
eventually I found a way
to pressure-wash that plug right out,
and that’s what DIY’s about.
B. Withers 2021