The topic is about preparing for and recovering from the final stage of ileostomy surgery, which involves the removal of the rectal stump and permanent closure of the anus. This procedure is sometimes referred to as the "Barbie/Ken-butt" surgery. The person scheduled for this surgery is understandably nervous and is seeking advice on what to expect in terms of discomfort and recovery time. Here are some helpful insights and advice shared by others who have gone through similar experiences:

1. Sitting and Cushioning
- Consider using a donut or "HOLY" pillow with a central hole when sitting, and take it with you wherever you go.
- Sit down slowly on chairs and toilets to avoid straining the newly sewn area. Some people find that a flat cushion provides comfort once the initial soreness decreases.
- A thick piece of rubber on a chair or bed can also add comfort.

2. Wound Care and Hygiene
- Be prepared for some oozing or seepage as the deep tissue heals. Placing a feminine napkin or light pad between the cheeks can help keep the area dry.
- A hand-held shower hose can make cleaning easier and help relieve itching, as plain tissue may not be sufficient.
- Allow the incision to be exposed to air whenever possible, even under bed covers, to keep it dry and promote healing.
- Watch out for tape allergies and request hypoallergenic tape to prevent hives.

3. Healing Timeline
- Healing can take anywhere from 6 weeks to 6 months, though conditions like Crohn’s disease may slow the process. Some people have experienced drainage for up to 3 years.
- Initial external stitches may dissolve, allowing the cheeks to separate gradually while deeper tissues continue to heal.

4. Daily Function and Sensations
- Some people retain partial sensation in the sphincter muscles, and may occasionally feel pressure or the urge to pass gas, but this usually subsides.
- Anal intercourse is no longer possible once the area is fully closed.

5. Pre- and Post-operative Tips
- Go into surgery as healthy as possible to avoid infection or sepsis. Carrying a few extra pounds can help with recovery stamina.
- Once cleared by your surgeon, gentle Kegel exercises can promote circulation and muscle tone.
- If a urinary catheter is needed, it can help keep the buttock incision cleaner.

6. Medications and Products
- Some people have used Buscopan (an antispasmodic) and Tramadol (an opioid analgesic) for pre-surgery rectal pain.

7. General Reassurance
- Many people emphasize that life improves significantly once healed. The discomfort is temporary, and the surgery can eliminate ongoing rectal disease and leakage issues.