This topic is about finding ways to bring a little humor to a serious situation. The poster's father just had colostomy surgery, and they want to lighten the mood during his first post-op visit with some funny ostomy-related jokes. The idea is to show that having an ostomy isn't as big a deal compared to facing cancer, and a good laugh might help lift his spirits. Here are some suggestions and insights shared by the community:

1. Ready-made ostomy one-liners:
- "Why can you always trust people with colostomy bags? They’re the only people you know aren’t full of shit."
- "I started selling bagpipes made from colostomy bags … needless to say, they sound like shit."
- "What’s the most difficult thing for a woman with a colostomy? Finding shoes to match her bag."
- "After my colostomy I use a semi-colon on a regular basis."
- "Every now and then Grandpa just loses his shit."
- "Today I learned there are some things you shouldn’t slap the shit out of—one of them being a colostomy bag."
- A golf joke where a doctor fakes a grim prognosis requiring colostomy-bag care, then says, “I’m just messing with you, she’s dead. What’d you shoot?”
- Classic: "What’s the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer? The taste."

2. Where to find more humor:
- Check out the forum section "Just for Laughs" for pages of jokes.
- Google searches can provide countless ostomy puns.
- Consider books and websites by comedian/ostomate Brenda Elsagher, like “I’d Like to Buy a Bowel, Please.”

3. Emotional readiness matters:
- Some members advise that right after surgery, patients might be in pain, fearful, or angry, so humor could backfire.
- Assess your dad’s mood first—be ready to switch from jokes to simple hugs and listening if he isn’t in the mood for laughter.
- Everyone is different; pay attention to his cues before diving into comedy.

4. Show solidarity:
- One suggestion is to "wear a bag for a week" (fill it with water, sleep with it, try it under favorite clothes) to show understanding and perhaps share some laughs together.

5. Light banter ideas:
- "Don’t let the nurses take advantage—rumor is ‘bag men’ are big down under since one bowel has to work harder." (A bit of tongue-in-cheek hospital humor.)
- Brainstorm novelty uses for ostomy bags, like hiding cash from muggers, to create ongoing inside jokes.