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Posted: Sat Sep 18, 2010 8:26 pm
“Young woman,” said the judge, “this court is going to see to it that you receive one thousand dollars a month in alimony.“Thanks,” the husband spoke up, “and I’ll try to give her a few bucks myself.”  


You are blocking the way, sir, said the usher to a man sprawled in the aisle of a theater. “Please get up.” The man didn’t move or reply. The usher called the manager over, who said, “I must ask you to move.” Still the prone man didn’t reply. So the manager called the police. “Get up or I’ll have to take you in,” the officer said. “Where did you come from anyway?” The man stirred finally and said, “the balcony.”


Two elderly couples were enjoying friendly conversation when one of the men asked the other,” Fred, how was the memory clinic you went to last month?" "Outstanding," Fred replied. "They taught us all the latest psychological techniques: visualization, association, etc. It was great." "That's great! And what was the name of the clinic?" Fred went blank. He thought and thought, but couldn't remember. Then a smile broke across his face and he asked, "What do you call that flower with the long stem and thorns?" "You mean a rose?" "Yes, that's it!" He turned to his wife, "Rose, what was the name of that memory clinic?"
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