Hi.. This is my first time here.. Hope there are some older women that can help me. I am 56 and had my urostomy in 03.. I was diagnosed with I.C., a really bad bladder disease.. I had my bladder removed but the pain came back in a month. It is a nerve entrapment.. Which where I live there is no doctor who treats it.. Just help to keep the pain down.. It is there 24/7. I am sure this is one factor in my depression.. I have been married for 37 years now.. Until my surgery, my husband and I had a great sex life.. But now.. It is all gone.. I guess he cannot look at it or thinks I am not the same pretty bombshell he married.. But when the sex left, so did the closeness.. The hand holding, the sitting by me to watch TV, etc.. We have never discussed it.. And please do not tell me to.. I have never been one to talk about my feelings.. He has not either.. In 5 years, I went from outgoing, always dressed nice, makeup the whole bit.. My house was always spotless.. Now I am the totally opposite.. I stay home, never wear makeup or fix my hair.. I just do not see the use in it anymore.. But.. I really wish I was back to the way I was.. Don't get me wrong.. I am content with my life and enjoy my pets and grandkids.. Is this an age thing or from the surgery?? I don't know.. I know no one else who has a urostomy to talk to.. I have grown daughters to talk to but not about the sex stuff.. They are in their 30s and think I am just a housebound old lady.. I sure hope there are others who have dealt with this even 5 years later.. I have done the therapist thing for over 3 years.. Gave it up.. And by the way.. Thanks for this site...
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