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32 and I feel like I'm doomed for a single life.

Posted by Millie2001, on Sun May 06, 2012 11:37 pm
Hi Marc

Im 28 nearly 29 and have been thru pretty similar, Im now 10yrs down the road with a permenant Ileostomy and an ex after 6yrs together!! I am lucky to say that the 2 are not related!!

When I became single at 27 I felt that no one was ever going to want to be with me ever again because of how different I was!!

When i was ready post break up I met quite a few different men who all had different reactions and a different take on how they felt about it.  Some were honest some not so much but I always knew why some guys never called again even if we had not even got that far into things!!

I then moved to Saudi (im from essex originally!!) vowing to earn loads of money and live a truly indulgent lifestyle with good friends and no men involved!!

All I will say is no matter what you plan life will always come along and change them!! I am very pleased to say I am now in a relationship with an amazing egyptian guy who is a little younger than me but is wise beyond his years!!

I even used my stoma to try and scare him off at first!! It didnt work as he had a friend who had bowel cancer very young so he knew all about 'my baggage'!!

The reason im telling you all of this is that I have been where you are right now!! who knows I may well be there again one day, but whatever you do dont give up!!

There are millions of single people in the world with and without bags, it doesnt define you as a person and anyone worth spending any significant amount of time with will know this!!

When your off the steroids things will settle, it take time to discover who you are and the person you have become but believe me you may well be pleasantly suprised by some of the people out there!! The rest of them are not worth your time or energy!!

Take Care

Millie xxxxx
Reply by aHappyGirl, on Sat Nov 24, 2012 9:20 pm
Hi - I recently met the man of my dreams ... on this site.  We're doing great.  Sometimes good things happen.
Past Member
Reply by Past Member, on Sun Dec 09, 2012 12:27 am
Can I just say...Marc, I've seen your profile (and pictures) and I don't think you would have any problem finding a date. Wink
Reply by merryberry, on Mon Jan 28, 2013 5:51 pm
i had a total colectomy at 25 yrs of age. i met my wonderful husband of 23yrs after my surgery. I was feeling very insecure but healthy and ready to get on with my life. When u get off all the drugs and stablize i hope u feel the same.
Reply by kruzer, on Thu Oct 22, 2015 3:34 pm

Mark.. 

 

Way off. You will find someone. But you got to get your head in the right place. Do you introduce yourself to women as "Mark- the fun, witty smart guy" 

or "Mark with an ostomy".. chicks dig witty fun guys. The stoma is a small side note. I don't think a woman that finds you atrractive because of your personality will mind the stoma part. But you can't lead with "Mark- the Stoma guy".. Don't let the stoma define who you are. It's a part of you no doubt but not all of you... Get your head in the right place and the babes will come..... 

Reply by gixer750, on Tue Jun 07, 2016 10:03 am

Chin up fella had 4 beautiful ladies in my life lost 2 to cancer 

One was a model still with the 4th 11 years now

She put a quote on face book once he might not be perfect 

But he's perfect for me .and she is 11 years younger than me 

Pisitive thinking is all it takes 

Dave c

Past Member
Reply by Past Member, on Sat Jun 25, 2016 2:15 pm

I get it. Totally. Sorry I don't have any advice.

Reply by Miss fudgeakins , on Thu Jul 28, 2016 4:56 am

Hey hun, I've got a permanent urostomy, my ex put me down etc and I've been hurt alot due to the problems I had prior to the urostomy last month, I can relate to how you feel, I joined the group in hope to find an equal a friend then maybe more in the future I'm petrified and unless you go through these ops peeps don't have a clue, but remember you are stronger than you realise and you will find the right one, so keep ya chin up, I'm emm by the way, always here if you want to chat or rant xx

Reply by Dee121, on Sun Nov 27, 2016 7:16 pm

Hi how are you? Nice pics..im new to the site...im from wolves and had uc for 6 years now with an ileostomy and would love to share experiences etc..

Reply by Dee121, on Sun Nov 27, 2016 7:18 pm

Hi

Reply by Eaglespirit, on Tue Nov 29, 2016 6:51 pm

Love your sense of humor!

Reply by NancyAnn, on Thu Aug 15, 2019 12:52 pm

Hi Mark, 

You are still quite young. Get you in order first then worry about dating and all that. You will meet someone who cares. I know that is the usual line that is given but it is true. But until you get yourself in the right mind set and feel better physically you don't need the extra pressure of a relationship. 

I hope you find someone eventually. Hang in there.

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