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Feeling normal

Welcome to MeetAnOstoMate
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Posted: Sat Jun 03, 2017 1:04 am

Hello everyone I'm going into my 6th months since receiving my colostomy bag....How long does it take to feel like me again? Some days I do fine other times I wake up and and I'm like"omg what

Is this creature on my belly? I don't think it has completely set in that I have this for the rest of life...gives me nervous butterflies 🦋 if I think about it too long. Those of that has had this ostomy longer than me ...how long did it take you? Your response is very much appreciated. Thanks a billion.

Posted: Sun Jun 04, 2017 3:16 am

Hi, Dr. Fields!  (like it?)

Six months. . . you're still a virgin in my books!  At 6 months I was still trying to figure out what my ostomy would and wouldn't do. At 6 months I would still get surprised by leakages.  And wondered if I had the right bag (good time to reevaluate that).  At six months my colostomy was still a complete mental panic.

It sounds a little silly but part of my emotional healing came from my family designating me to my own bathroom (because emptying my colostomy bag stinks so badly).  Hubby installed a power fan.  Kids avoid it.  So I have 100% control of a LITTLE room.  It's a little bathroom that has barely enough room for a little sink and a small shower and a toilet. But in a tiny way.  But it's MINE!!!    I am continually adding to it, with fun mirrors and wall hangings and painted mantras and neat lighting and. . . in short, my colostomy shock finds a peaceful exhibit in a mini-bathroom space. In short, Art helps.

I had my surprise colostomy in 2014.  Now, in 2017, I often wake up with WTF! complete surprise that I have a colostomy. And then I remember, and start my day.  Your bag is your stoma's friend.  Have you named your stoma?  Mine's "Holly."

Don't be alone with it.    You found us, keep with us, it IS tough but we're here for you.

 

 

 

 

Posted: Sun Jun 04, 2017 1:50 pm

Hi.

Get onto Stoma irrigation if you can, then you can feel perfectly normal.

No bag, just a cap. What's not inside you, can't come out. 

If you can its the perfect solution to incontinence.

John

Posted: Sun Jun 04, 2017 9:01 pm

Hello everyone.....for the past month I have been trying regulate when I go, but it still just do  it when it wants to. I mean EVERYTIME I eat it starts emptying ten minutes or less. I really have to be careful. I'm still a little hesitant around some of my family. I'm not depressed I don't believe but I think I'm just frustrated because I can't time it right so that I'm in control when it act up. I read some of your posts and I'm trying to understand how some of you time it. It sounds so simple. I know it is going to take a little more time I just truly wish I was a veteran at this.

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 3:36 am

When you get an ostomy, you wil get two problems.

- an ostomy to take care of

- the problems between your ears

 

Taking care of the ostomy is a question of practical handling, and can be learned from ostomy specialized nurses.

The problems between the ears, are in many cases imaginations because of lack of knowlegde and fear, most of with no reason.
Try to concentrate om family, friends, hobbies and other interestes, then you will find that there will be less room for worring trouths of the ostomy.
Try to have daily routines, because if you have the same routine every day, the testine will use the same routine. Irrigation as recommendet could also be a good solution.

 

 

 

 

 

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 5:54 am

DrFields,

Feeling "normal" is relative, to how long you have your ostomy, and how you are managing it.  Some never feel the same again, and it's understandable.   Your body has changed, your routines are different, so it's unrealistic, to feel  the same......   Aiming for a New Normal, is a challenge, but it will happen when  you get proficient, and comfortable with successfully managing you colostomy. 

I your goal is to "time" your output, then consider doing irrigations.   If y ou don't know how to do it, request an ostomy nurse, and if that's not available, check out the videos on line.   One is quite good, but the setting is in the hospital , so it looks more like a medical procedure.  Basically, using special tubing, you are giving yourself an enema.......Once you fill yourself with water, you keep it in you for about 1/2 an hour...   a special larger pouch, called a sleeve, can be attached to your wafer.  When your body is ready, it will push the water/ feces out.   I think the whole procedure takes about an hour.   People do it either once a day, or every other day, whatever works for you.   To the best of my knowledge,  that's the only way to "time" colostomy output.  I have an ileostomy, so my output goes continuously, and I wear a pouch with a spout on the bottom.  I empty every few hours, depending on the output..   If you have any questions, ask colostomates who irrigate to write to you, to tell you what they do.   Best of luck to you. 

Marsha

 

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 10:58 am

I HAVE HAD MY OSTOMY FOR OVER 40 YEARS. IT TOOK A FEW MONTHS FOR ME TO ACCEPT IT AND NOW I JUST THINK OF IT AS NORMAL FOR ME AND PART OF MY DAILY LIFE. I HAVE FULLY ADAPTED TO THE ROUTINE I MUST FOLLOW. SURE I WISH I DIDN'T HAVE IT BUT THAT IS NOT PART OF MY REALITY.

IT SEEMS THAT IT IS HARDER FOR PEOPLE WHO DON’T HAVE AN OSTOMY TO ACDCEPT MINE THAN IT IS FOR ME TO ACCEPT IT.


BEST OF LUCK AND THINGS WILL CHANGE WITH TIME.
TOM SCHNEIDER

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 12:33 pm

Hi Tom do you irrigate or still change bag

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 12:36 pm

Thanks Marsha for the info very helpful 

 

Denise

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 12:44 pm

drfields, 

The only way I have some control over my colostomy is by irrigating..I say some control cause sometimes I have some output throughout the day..doesn't happen often though.. I don't use a cap..I use a mini pouch..It took me some time to feel like me again.. I was depressed cause my stoma looked like a creature out of syfy movie. It was prolapse and I had a hernia to deal with.. every one is different when they get to feeling "nornal" again..I have a stoma that looks "normal" now and life is good.. 

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 3:48 pm

Hey Drfields, you’ve gotten some good advice here. From these replies you can probably feel the compassion and desire to help you. To expound a little on what Marsha offered, your new normal is the same you with some physical changes. How you accept the new you might be more difficult. It is what it is and there are all kinds of things to try. Some will work better than others and pretty soon you’ll choose what works best for you. You’ll find a routine, get very comfortable with it and, maybe, get a little excited about sharing it with others. While your brain is watching you work with the physical part, make sure it understands you’re the boss, you’ll make the whole thing good in due time and don’t let it even try to bring you down. Invite your brain to celebrate each success and keep us posted on how well the new you is making out.
Respectfully,
Mike

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 6:51 pm

The ostomy is the new you. I ahve had one for 18 months and still struggle with the thought of leaking.

It will happen again I am sure just carry supplies and extra apparell .Make it happen 

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 8:23 pm

Drfields

 

My sister who has had a colostomy for 2 years seems to complain about the same problem.  I, myself have had an ileostomy for 65 years!  I have concluded that my sister, and perhaps you, find it unnatural to have human waste anywhere on the body.  She feels that a one piece appliance is the only thing to use and that she must change anytime she has a BM.  Consequently she stays home all the time, and hates her colostomy.  That is the purpose of the pouch...to collect human waste.  It's okay to have the bag fill up a little and to drain it without having to change everything. We A drain able pouch gives you that freedom and will allow you to socialize

Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 9:38 pm

Dr Fields,

i completely understand. Although I "just" have a urostomy, I have the same fears... the same anger... and it makes me think of what "normal" really is. Accepting your situation? Acknowledging the anger? Making things work for YOU? I just don't know...

Know that I am in the same space, and somehow we will make it through....

MMM

 

Posted: Fri Jun 09, 2017 11:04 pm

How long did it take to feel normal again.....maybe about a year for the most part. Physical recovery and getting on my feet was difficult, I had a lot of weight to regain and didn't like feeling weak after walking a few steps. Mentally it was not to bad as I knew I would have to have my stoma forever.

You have to celebrate the good days and work toward having as many as you can make. You can do it, one day at a time. Eventually you will notice it's routine, and no big deal. Be kind to yourself, set yourself up to be happy and go on with life, after all it's what you make of it.

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