I am so sorry to hear about your treatment by that doctor. Unfortunately, many doctors do suffer from a "God" complex, thinking "if only that patient would just shut up and do what I tell them!" This is no way for him to act, and this is no way for you to live. Deep breath, clean slate, let's look at your problems one by one.
First, do you leak a lot right now? A little or a lot? Have you tried different products? Many places will send you free samples, so you can try different products to see which ones work best for you. There are lots of products which can help with a leak issue. One of the best I have found is Aqua Seal by Costa Medical. This waterproof thin membrane goes on over the appliance, but beneath the pouch, and extends beyond the limits of the faceplate. If you have any breakthroughs, it can contain them easily until you can change your appliance.
Do you have contact with a local ostomy nurse or ostomy support group? You can probably find very caring, very knowledgeable people there who can help and support you in this time of your need. Remember, whether physical or psychological, YOUR NEEDS ARE REAL, and you have as much right as ANYBODY ELSE to competent, caring treatment, which you did NOT get from your first doctor.
You might try to carry a piece of paper with a message written in LARGE letters: "I can not speak, but I have things to say and questions to ask. Please look at the tablet." If they will not, walk out and woek to find another practitioner, whether it be doctor, nurse, or other. You have a RIGHT TO ASK QUESTIONS AND BE HEARD, even if that is through a tablet rather than your voice.
Try to be more social, even though you want to shrink back. It will help enormously with your outlook on life, and your feelings about yourself. Push through this, even if you don't want to. Making contacts, especially with an ostomy support group if you can find one locally, might lead to referrals to a better physician than the jerk who saw you first.
Lastly, here on the board, WE CARE ABOUT YOU! Please follow up and let us know how you are doing.