Hello Vicky.
I had to smile at the title to your post because if my doctor had said that, I would have replied that 'everytime I reach out, I drop something'. Most of our beautiful china has been dropped and broken in recent years because we simply cannot hold onto small objects like we used to and we have taken to all manner of different things to try to alleviate arthritic pain. Here, in the UK, with its cold and wet climate, arthritis seems to be endemic and it appears to affect us oldies particularly badly. That is perhaps why so many retired people have been opting to migrate to southern France and Spain. However, with the ridiculous exit from the EU, it looks as if this option will now be closed to those who may have wanted to give it a try.
Living with a stoma is relatively easy compared to living with the sorts of psychological problems that you list in your post but add them together and they don't exactly make things any better. What does help a little, is to develop a positive attitude and to try to look for positives in every negative you face. They are there if we look hard enough and don't let the negative stuff so overwhelm us that we get stuck in them. In this respect, your doctor is probably right, in that sometimes, reaching out can be a positive distraction from all the things that seem so negative.
I have read your past posts and your replies to others on this site and can confidently say that it looks as if you are already 'reaching-out', which is a good start.
For my part, I find that going out into the community and trying to help others is a worthwhile exercise, that takes my mind away from the more immediate negatives in my own life. It is perhaps unsurprising that, when I am face to face with other people's problems, that are far worse than my own, it puts all my angst into a different perspective and helps me to carry on regardless. Sometimes, the people I meet, just want a companion to share (rant) their own troubles with and I can appreciate that need, as it can sometimes have a cathartic effect to express oneself in this way. Fortunately, I have the ability and capacity to listen attentively and empathise with what others are saying about their unenviable lot in life. However, this skill is assisted by the fact that often they are expressing views that I can easily relate to because similar things are happening to me.
This is why a site such as this is so useful in bringing people together who already have something in common, which makes it easier to talk about at least one aspect of potential negativity without attracting a negative or judgmental response.
My own feeling is that the term 'being patient' is often an excuse for sitting back and not doing anything to try to change things. I prefer to get out there and try to make things better for others which, in turn, helps me to feel better within myself, even if it doesn't change my own physical ailments, and the ravages of old age.
I hope things work out for you soon.
Best wishes
Bill