Not all men are jerks, just like not all women are jerks. I don't know if I've been lucky or what, but I've never had a guy care about my ostomy. When I tell them (and I always do it in a lighthearted way so that it's clear that it's not a big deal to me and therefore shouldn't be a big deal to them), they always ask these two questions:
1) sooooo, you have a bag of poop on your side? (me: if I don't empty it, yes) and
2) does your vag still work?
I heard this awhile back and fully believe it: Any guy who walks away from you simply because of an ostomy is not a real man, and has no place in your life.