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Trouble Everywhere

 
Posted by Babydoll, on Wed Sep 26, 2018 1:53 am

Hey all, long time no see... Just been out of it for a long time after my last surgery but here I am and doing better. Well here goes... I don't know how to cope how my body looks and how I feel about myself anymore. I look at myself in the mirror and I cry from all the scars I have and feel as if no one will love me since society now a days wants a picture perfect woman which I know doesn't exist. But I've always been pretty confident about myself until lately. I don't know who to go to or where... I've had a lot of positive vibes off this site and when one post here everyone helps as much as they can which to me I appreciate a lot. Well as for me yes I had my first surgery done in my home town for a removal of a cisc behind my ovary... But my smart ass Dr didn't remove it and left it in there while he did a number on me. Yeah one more scar added there...besides all the poking and test I went through... So we found out through a nurse the Dr left it inside of me and I had to be sent to another hospital out of town as a emergency, Yh horrible ambulatory drive all the way there. As like any other hospital u have to go through the whole process and I waited for so long for my pain med which I cried my heart out all night since they didn't have the Dr prescribe it yet of course it was night time already... So Yh now more test more poking more of everything and waiting for a Dr to take me to get surgery done... One brave Dr did... I had my first surgery done but since the home town Dr did a mess I lost my ability to have children ever again... 💔😢... So then I had a colostomy for 1 yr and then had a reversal... Didn't go well during surgery so I needed the illeostomy which didn't go well with that either... But at least I got it removed after a month... It was a battle for me since each surgery. It was very hard on my family myself and the Dr... I am blessed to be here since I wasn't suppose to make it. But after all this now I feel useless and still sick after all this... I have a hard time walking and my back kills me... I can't get any type of medical service atm since I'm not working but I can't pay for one since again I have no money yet. I don't know what to do. I do want to work again but I get so tired very quick. I just feel lost and depressed all the time. 

 
Past Member
Reply by Past Member, on Wed Sep 26, 2018 3:59 am

Hi Babydoll,  I'm so sorry to read another horror story about medical incompetence and what people in this country go through when they don't have the necessary medical insurance.  Something has to be done about that!   Please don't give up on what it takes to get the medical financial aid you need to alleviate the pain you still have.  

Don't worry about the scars.  You're a beautiful young woman and any man worth his salt is not going to mind the scars.  Please believe that.  There are good men out there and you will find them.

Linda

 
Reply by soulscope, on Wed Sep 26, 2018 7:59 am

This far proves you a Survivor

 
Reply by Babydoll, on Wed Sep 26, 2018 1:45 pm

Ty and I hope he is out there... If u find one throw him my way... 😊 

 
Reply by Mrs.A, on Wed Sep 26, 2018 4:26 pm

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder is a statement most of us believe. So where is our beauty? I believe it is more important to be a person of beauty rather than a beautiful person. It is who we are rather than what we look like. Sure outer beauty can be nice but it's the inner beauty that really counts. Remember don't judge a book by it's cover? Another important statement that most of us know.

Confidence in who you are comes from within, keep looking inward because you have it in you.

 
Reply by Xerxes, on Wed Sep 26, 2018 10:15 pm

It's a shame what the medical profession gets away with. Hang in there, good things always happen to good people.

X_

 
Reply by Babydoll, on Thu Sep 27, 2018 8:59 am

Ty all... Sorry just venting a little since I've been pretty depressed. Thks to you all. ❤

 
Reply by Bill, on Fri Sep 28, 2018 1:43 am

Venting can be a healthy exercise in the right place - and this is the right place. 

Best wishes

Bill

 
Reply by Babydoll, on Sat Sep 29, 2018 1:53 am

It sure is Bill

 
Reply by lockdownrts, on Sun Sep 30, 2018 9:17 pm

HI I AM NEW TO THID WEBSITE I HAVE HAD A STOMA FOR OVER 5 YEARS I KNOW AT FIRDST ITS SO HARD TO GET OVER IT. BEFORE I HAD THAT I CROHNS DIEASE AND I WAS TOLD IF I DONT GET AN OPEARATION DONE I WILL DIE IN FEW MONTHS I LAUGHED AT THE DOCTORS AND SAID THEY HAVING ME ON. AFTER MY OPEARTION I CAME ABIT BETTER BUT STILL HAD THE WOUNDS ON MY BELLY AND WHEN I LOOKED AT THE MIRRIOR I CRIED EVERYDAY BUT THEN I GOT USED TO IT. I WAS UNDER DEPRSIION TABLETS IF YOU ACCEPT HOW YOU LOOK IT GET ALOT BETEER AS YOU ARE NOT CONCERNED OF HOW POEPLE THINK. ALL OFF MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY SUPPORT AND EVERYONW WHO I TALK TO KNOW ABOUT MY CONDITON. 

 

 
Reply by Babydoll, on Sun Sep 30, 2018 9:25 pm

Hello there, yes it is very hard. My scars I see that I didn't before and they remind me of what I went through just like you and everyone else on here. I guess I'm going through a tough moment rn. I feel as if my world I'd going down on me rn. I am in a deep depression. Idk what to do. 

 
Reply by lockdownrts, on Sun Sep 30, 2018 9:26 pm

DO YOU HAVE A PARTNER MIND ME ASKING 

 

 
Reply by lockdownrts, on Sun Sep 30, 2018 9:32 pm

BEFORE MY OPEARATION I WAS READY TO GET MARRIED. MY OPEARTION WAS IN JANUARY AND I GOT MARRIED IN APRIL IT WAS HARD AS ALL THE ARRANGEMENTS FOR THE WEDDINGN WERE MADE AND I COULD NOT CANCEL AS ALL CARDS AND ARRANGEMBETS FOR WEDDING WAS DONE. THE GIRL WHO  MARRIED DID  NOT HAVE MUCH OF CLUE TO WHAT I WAS GOING THROUGH MY FIRST NIGHT WITH HER WAS SO HARD I CANNOT FORGET IT AS I FELT ASHAMED TAKING MY TOP OFF. OVER THE TIME SHE GOT USED TO IT AND SHE HAS HELP ME THROIUGH HELL AND BACK BUT I KNOW ITS HARD FOR HER AS SHES ALWAYS SUPPORTED ME. NOW I HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR OVER 6YEARS AND HAVE 2 BEAUTFIL KIDS I WAS TOLD BY DOCTORS I WILL NEVER HAVE KIDS BUT GUESS WHAT I HAVE 1 BOY AND A GIRL. ME AND MY WIFE GET ALONG WITH EACH OTHER TIME TO TIME. WHEN MY BAG BURST SHE WILL HELP ME TO CLEAN MY SELF AND THE BED SHEETS NOW WE BOTH SLEEP ON DIFFERNT BED AS I DONT FEEL THE SAME THING FOR HER. MY LOVE LACKS THER I KNOW SHE HAS DONE ALOT FOR ME. 

 
Reply by Babydoll, on Mon Oct 01, 2018 1:32 am

Wow maybe u should try n get that spark back with her. Its never to late to try if your both willing. 

 
Reply by lockdownrts, on Thu Oct 04, 2018 11:57 am

yes i know but its hard be really she knows its finished but for kids we are toghther. how are you 

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