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Why I became a member of meet an ostomate(MAO)

Posted by Angelicamarie, on Thu Oct 04, 2018 6:54 pm

On the morning of August 23 2015, I woke up with a ostomy. Prior to leaving the hospital, I was shown how to prepare and change my appliance. However this surgery changed my life.

I found an ostomy support group in Springfield , Ohio, The meetings were held in the evenings at 7:30 pm. I attended one meeting and the subject was how great their surgeon was. That"s not what I wanted to hear nor needed at that time. I never went back, the drive was quite far and I was afraid an accident would occur (poop).

By mistake I stumbled upon this site.  As I read the stories of men and women, I knew I wasn't alone.  Some of my concerns were addressed just reading their stories.

I lacked confidence because of the ostomy.

Would I still be attractive to my significant other?

How could I wear nice things and still conceal my pouch?

Would I still be sexually desirable?

I thought of so many reasons why I joined but the things listed above were some of the concerns.

The bottom line is, I needed support and thats what (MAO) provided for me.

Why did you join?




Last edited by Angelicamarie on Sat Oct 06, 2018 6:47 am; edited 5 times in total
Reply by Babydoll, on Thu Oct 04, 2018 11:17 pm

Hi Angelicamarie,

Well I have seen your post and I've also seen u have commented on some I have put before... I joined this site for comfort and to see if I could get answers on things I was going at the time. I thought that after all my surgeries and having no bags I would be OK and not need support anywhere but I was and am wrong. I feel as if I need it now more than ever and I am so comfortable coming here and reading stroires same as you. We are not alone and I'm glad there are good people out there that we can all cope with. Have a great night... 😊

Reply by Bill, on Fri Oct 05, 2018 1:42 am

Hello Angelicamarie. Thanks for yet another thought-provoking post. I was tempted not to reply to this because I am not a 'member' in the sense that I do not pay subscriptions. However, over the years I have felt that I 'pay my way' in terms of literary input and this is often recognised by admin when they make me an honorary member for the months when my posts have been most numerous.  The reason I first contributed to this site was because I was struggling with the new stoma and in those early days I was writing rhyming verses to help clarify and manage the emotional and psychological side of the experiences. Where else could I share these rhymes? Except maybe, with people who might be experiencing the same sort of things and, therefore, might appreciate what I was going through and also the rhymes which tried to capture the accompanying feelings.  My motivation for continuing to correspond on MAO have changed from those early days but that digresses slightly from your basic question and could be a subject for another post.

Best wishes


Reply by Angelicamarie, on Fri Oct 05, 2018 4:09 am

Bill... thanks for sharing,  appreciate the support!


Reply by Angelicamarie, on Fri Oct 05, 2018 4:25 am

Babydoll... excuse me for not responding to you first, I had no idea you had commented. I do appologize.  Thanks so much for sharing and commenting. Your so right and we’re not alone. 


Past Member
Reply by Past Member, on Fri Oct 05, 2018 7:49 am

I joined for the same reason as you bottom  I stumbled on this site by accident when looking for particular supplies online.  After reading only a few posts, I knew I wanted to find out more.  There are no local support groups for ostomates around this territory and the hospital never mentioned any online support groups either.  I was totally in the dark as to finding anyone to talk to about the issues I had...other than the stoma nurses.  They were okay, but let's face it...they don't live with what we live their advice is extremely limited on many things. 

I can see why you didn't go back to the first support group.  If they were all talking about how great their surgeon was, I would have run out screaming.  My surgeon was NOT great.  He screwed it up big time and I have a feeling that that particular group would have not been the place to "vent".  lol

On this site, you can praise OR you can vent and you will always find people who have been in the same place you are and understand what you're saying.  This site has been a blessing to me.  It really has.

Reply by Angelicamarie, on Fri Oct 05, 2018 8:10 am

weirdnewlife... appreciate your comments and support.

Be safe

Angelicamarie aka Angel

Reply by Babydoll, on Fri Oct 05, 2018 8:38 am

No worries... 😊

Reply by Mrs.A, on Sun Oct 14, 2018 12:15 am

Hi Angelicamarie,

I joined because I didn't have a stoma nurse and I had a swollen stoma. I was not sure why or if it was a serious problem. I don't like to sit in the doctor's office. My husband found MAO and I had found a different site. This one had answers that I could read right away without any fees. Courious about what else might ly ahead I joined to see what I could learn. That if I can remember was in 06. Now I'm just addicted.


Reply by Angelicamarie, on Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:40 am

Mrs. A.   Thanks for sharing... I too wanted to learn and I did and continue learning. I believe I'm addicticted to the site also. ( smile)  Thanks again!


Reply by Grammy, on Tue Oct 16, 2018 4:25 pm

Question for you about your post: what are the problems you are having with no bags? Did you get reattached?


Reply by Gidget, on Tue Oct 16, 2018 4:40 pm

I joined because I am having my ileostomy the Monday after Thanksgiving.  I am scared, confused and need guidance.  What is the worst part about having an ostomy bag?  What surprised you the most?  What did no one tell you?  Do you feel better?  Any answers appreciated.

Reply by Angelicamarie, on Tue Oct 16, 2018 6:13 pm

Grammy... your responding to the wrong post.


Reply by Angelicamarie, on Tue Oct 16, 2018 6:36 pm

Gidget.. I think its natural to be scared of the unknown. I can only speak for myself. the worst part for me was the addition to my body. also you have no control over your intestines. if one dont have an ostomy they go by what other patients say.  I have good and bad days.  I had my surgery after experiencing a blockage in my small intestines.  The surgeon slip of the knife, caused me to have chronic diarreah.  It was going to cause septic or death. It was a life saver for sure, I have come to terms with my change. (Im alive)  learn all that you can, but dont beat yourself up. I found this site by accident. Listening to others have helped me with my journey. Good Luck!




Reply by Gidget, on Tue Oct 16, 2018 6:48 pm

Thanks Angelicamarie!  I hope you are having a good day Smile

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