COVID-19 related

How about some humor for a change of  ... everything?

New monthly budget: Gas $0 Entertainment, $0 Clothes $0, Groceries $2,799.

Breaking News: Wearing a mask inside your home is now highly recommended. Not so much to stop COVI-19, but to stop eating.

We low maintenance chicks are having our moment right now. We don't have nails to fill and paint, roots to dye, eyelashes to re-mink, and are thrilled not to have to get dressed every day. I have been training for this moment my entire life!

When this quarantine is over, let's not tell some people.

I stepped on my scale this morning. It said "Please practice social distancing. Only one person at a time."

Not to brag, but I haven't been late to anything in over 11 weeks.

It may take a village to raise a child but I swear it takes a vineyard to home school one.

I wanted zombies and anarchy. Instead we got working from home and toilet paper shortages. Worst Apocalypse Ever!

Day 47: The garbage man placed an AA flyer on my recycling bin.

Remember when we were little and we had underwear that had the days of the week on them? Yah .. that would be helpful about now.

The spread of Covid-19 is based on 2 things:
**How dense the population is.
**How dense the population is.

For the second part of this quarantine do we have to stay with the same family or will they relocate us?

Almost forgot my favourite analogy - I stopped gaining weight when I stopped weighing myself.

They can open things up next month. I'm staying in until August to see what happens to you all first.:)K

Hi Sis............hysterical!!!  Thanks for that.  Did you really have the days of the week on your underwear when you were a kid?  Must have been nice to have been able to afford underwear.......man, that shag carpet caused some serious rug burns, now that I recall.  

Hang in there girl........it'll just be a few more months before people will pay anything for the cure.......and THEN Big Pharma will release it!  Thanks for the humor!

regards,

bob

THANK YOU, Karen.  Hilarious!  We needed that.

Maybe in a month or two, you, Bob and I can get an IPO for the cure and get even richer than we are already.  With money though.

Mike

Thanks for the laughs, Kmed. Humor always helps. :)

Janyce

Hello Karen.

Thank you so much for this post. I find myself re-reading it for a repeated smile first thing in the morning.

Best wishes

Bill

Cute! And damn if it ain't true! Lol

Karen,  I know I'm late to the party on this post but I laughed, and I laughed, and I laughed again.  Thank you for keeping it real.

Nancy

Enjoyed your post thanks for the laugh.

I have some friends and former retired colleagues living in The Villages in Florida. In respose to some brekaing news a while ago, one clever person added his unpolitized twist to the event.

"The rioting in major cities across the U.S. has spread to The Villages, Florida, a retirement community of 100,000.

Looters in "Florida’s Friendliest Hometown" have especially broken into stores that sell items like laxatives, vitamins, hearing aids, reading glasses, energy drinks and surgical stockings.

The thugs were easily caught and arrested since they were using their walkers and golf carts to flee. The protests have been limited to the evening hours because most of the lawbreakers either had doctor’s appointments during the day or rioting would have interfered with their naps.

The marches didn’t last that long because many of the demonstrators had to get home to pee. In many cases, the demonstrators simply forgot why they were even there.

Officials considered a curfew starting at 9 p.m. But since that’s the time when most of the residents go to bed anyway, it was decided that it wasn’t needed. Community leaders concluded that part of the problem was that residents were restless because they had too much time on their hands since the recreation centers, pools, theaters, boutique stores and especially the bars were closed due to the corona virus.

Community officials wanted to form a committee to look further into the problem, but the next day no one could remember why they needed a committee."

I spotted this photo-opp on my way home from grocery shopping yesterday.  My caption, "If the sea gulls can social distance, why can't we."

Hey Karen

I have to admit the FIRST thing I noticed was the bus, and I thought FURTHER......:-)

PEACE

NANCY

Hi  Nancy,

I wish I would have taken a better picture of the sea gulls social distancing because it was very surreal.

Oh yeah - new thing today, on a small lake in northern Alberta, where I went for a day of Northern Pike and perch fishing, I had an intense 15 minute conversation with a loon - really. I now talk "loonie."

We call the Canadian dollar coin - a "loonie" and the two dollar coin - a "toonie." Stay safe,K.

Hmmm ...

THAT is hysterical! I just got to send that one around work tomorrow!  Thanks for that!

Regards,

Bob

I have done that but luckly for me I did not get caught. Also have seen a lot of people do it.

Maybe I'm just not seeing it...........but I don't see any mask straps behind his ears or around his head or neck.  Maybe he just stole the vest.  I got one from Walmart that way.  And of course my McDonalds hat.  

;0)

bob