Ostomy Memories of Keeping My Mouth Shut


SOMETIMES KEEPING YOUR MOUTH SHUT is the wisest tactic. We have occasion to deal regularly with a fellow who appears to be my political opposite number. He spouts rightwing bumper sticker concepts all the time. My wife worries that I’m going to respond and cause our ongoing brief but regular interaction with this guy to be at risk. So far I have been able to adhere to the maxim of Publilius Syrus: “I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.” A couple of days ago, when this guy proclaimed that the Russian invasion of Ukraine was all Biden’s fault, I almost lost it. My wife gave me one of her “Don’t do it” looks and I bit my tongue. There are times to engage, and times to avoid engagement. I’m hopeful that he doesn’t again say something so absurd, so lacking in factual predicate, that I’ll lose my control and contradict him. I just keep reminding myself that you can’t offer rational argument to an irrational or fanatical or indoctrinated person. They don’t hear it; they don’t understand it; they refuse to consider it. Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they’re open.

Past Member

I agree, Henry. Sometimes keeping your mouth shut is the wisest tactic. LOL Because if someone has an idea/opinion in their head of what's going on, and they believe it wholeheartedly, then what is the point of saying anything? They won't be open to hear the truth. And they probably wouldn't believe it anyway. Best to just tend to our own gardens.

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ron in mich

Hi Henry, we have friends who we thought were intelligent people who still believe the election was stolen. After all the audits and recounts, there's no changing their minds.


Just a thought here....What is truth?

What is that saying? Oh yah,

One man's truth is another man's falsehood

No no that's not right, it's ahhhh

One man's junk is another man's treasure....

Same difference...mayhaps.....

Per Kermathy Frog
"Some things are better left unsaid which I generally realize right after I have said them"

Me: Sometimes I just like to stir the shit-pot so to speak...

Past Member
Reply to Justbreathe

So true...everyone's perception of reality is different. And the world keeps turning...

Words of Encouragement from Ostomy Advocates I Hollister
Reply to ron in mich

Amazing, isn't it Ron, that such brainwashing can occur.  I assume that there just are some people, predominent in Trump voters, who have such weak cognitive foundations, and such glaring social deprivations, that they are highly susceptible to this sort of bogus baloney.  As Trump himself said during the 2016 race:  "I love the uneducated." 


Good for you, Henry, for remaining silent! I'm not sure I would have been able to. Your wife is a good sidekick to have around. Knowing when to keep my mouth shut is something I'm getting better at, but these are challenging times we are living in. I'm being tested a lot more often now, it seems!


Reply to HenryM

Did he really say that, Henry? Perhaps the man is a little more self-aware than I gave him credit for.

Reply to delgrl525

I believe that is an exact quote from during the '16 campaign.  He realizes that no one with any sense would vote for him.

Past Member

One of my mom's wisdoms "Everyone is different, they each believe differently than one another, eat differently than one another, live differently than one another. It's what makes the world go 'round. When you meet someone totally different than you, remember that and that it costs nothing to be kind and to be quiet."

Past Member

Your mom was wise.


I agreed, Henry.

Reply to HenryM

And I'm sure it went right over the heads of his faithful followers. This reminds me of a couple of musicians my husband used to play with back in the eighties. One was a singer who was a reformed drinker and looked at his half-cut audience with disdain. Before going off stage, he would say to them "We're going to take a short break now, while you can continue to swill beer!!". Another used to tell his audience at least once a night, to "make sure to drink lots of beer, 'cause it makes you smart!!". In both cases, the audience would clap and cheer, not realizing they were being insulted!



I have learned that when I argue, the more entrenched the other person gets in their beliefs. I am the polar opposite of my sister politically and that is all that happened when I would talk with her. I've learned to keep my mouth shut.

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