Logo for MeetAnOstoMate
Support | Friendship | Relationships
27,324 members

Surrounded by people who don’t get it

Wed Jul 27, 2022 4:34 pm
"This is the best website for people with an Ostomy, hands down. So much understanding. Everyone should join."

Just need to vent a little: Going to hear some music down by a river town, which I love. Earlier, at home getting ready, I was just kind of thinking out loud, something along the lines of, “I hope our friends are staking a spot near the bathrooms.” My husband said, “Well, I don’t know, ask them to move. What’s the big deal?” It really is so NOT a big deal, just one of those times when I realize my needs are different from the average person who brings food and drink, walks afterwards, all without a thought. I sometimes wish there was ONE other person in my social circle who simply said, “Me, too.”  Ok, thanks for listening everyone. I feel better. 😘

Wed Jul 27, 2022 5:02 pm

Just remember, they’re the odd balls, you’re the cool one. 

MeetAnOstoMate - 27,324 members
Wed Jul 27, 2022 5:03 pm

Over the years, one gets accustomed to it.  My spouse knows, of course, and that helps maintain a certain level of sanity when I begin to worry about such things.  You get resigned, philosophical, and you move beyond the sort of frustration that you rightfully express.  Reality dictates, and so you flex with it.  The times that bother me the most are when I am forced to utilize a Porta-Potty, always disgusting, because I know I won't make it home otherwise.  Anyway, don't worry; we all suffer these same episodes and come out the other side okay.

Wed Jul 27, 2022 5:16 pm

I love using a porta  potty. Lean over and let it go, bout the fastest way to empty. Carry a travel size thing of wet wipes and you don’t even have to touch that disgusting toilet paper either. The bathroom on train engines are just about the same. I also always just kneel to empty, never sit down. 

Wed Jul 27, 2022 5:19 pm


AlexT wrote:

I love using a porta  potty. Lean over and let it go, bout the fastest way to empty. Carry a travel size thing of wet wipes and you don’t even have to touch that disgusting toilet paper either. ...

I just used one!

Wed Jul 27, 2022 5:19 pm


AlexT wrote:

Just remember, they’re the odd balls, you’re the cool one. 

Thanks for the laugh, I needed that!

Wed Jul 27, 2022 5:21 pm


HenryM wrote:

Over the years, one gets accustomed to it.  My spouse knows, of course, and that helps maintain a certain level of sanity when I begin to worry about such things.  You get resigned, philosophical...

Y’know, it usually is not a big deal at all. Just today for some reason. The music will start and I’ll be over it. Thanks for the words of wisdom.

Wed Jul 27, 2022 6:17 pm

I'm new to the ostomy circle, but I'm required to measure my liquid output for the moment. I do feel its easier to just empty into the w.c. rather than a measuring jug! I was out to lunch the other day and quickly realised even moreso than I had thought about how important the proximity to toilets is for us ostomates. And the  cleanliness issue of such areas is even more important. God, we take so much for granted in our  lives til change is forced on us and we have to re-think our daily self care routines! I feel your pain hun!

Mabsie Moll 🙋🏼‍♀️ 

Wed Jul 27, 2022 6:54 pm


eefyjig wrote:

I just used one!

Hi Eefy ....I hope evertthing came out all right  !! 🤭😜...Magoo ☘

Wed Jul 27, 2022 7:18 pm

On any kind of public transport I am very happy to ust the bathroom .

I don't have to sit down !!

I don't have to touch Anything !! 

I just Dump and Run ...Two minutes so I don't have to Breathe the Air for very long !! 

Always keep some sheets of Paper Towel, just 3 or 4 sheets  -as well as Toilet Paper . 

I always have a backpack and keep a roll of 2 inch Micropore Paper Tape . A strip of that at the right time can give you 15 minutes lead time , roughly . 

Any Fast Food resraurant or Pub has a decent bathroom except for the Old Timey Pubs  ( a Technical Term) where the old dudes have a bad aim !!  

  I recently lost a Ten year old Extended family member and had an " Interesting " day !!  I will write so.ethin about that in Forum .

  In huge crowds I just drink very little but just enough   and eat a Banana during the day . I might drink a coke very slowly for the Caffeine but let some of the gas escape . Usually I get away with only some gas in the bag . You can open the end ( if it's just gas !) of the Bag in a tight crowd and let the gas out if you absolutely have to . I went to 4th of July fireworks show in Manhattan once with my camera ( will post some ) where there were at least 2 Million people on the Hudson River side . I was terrified of a disaster !! But I had a change of clothes ...don't forget underwear and socks !!! ...Shit flows Downhill !!! 🤯😭 😜.  I never needed the porta potty all day !!  It was a total success and I was alone so nobody to watch my "Stuff " if I had to run for the Potty !!  New York City people are The Best !!! 😘. Not even a candy wrapper left behind !! A few years ago .

 Sorry , rambling again 🤯☘...Magoo ☘

Wed Jul 27, 2022 7:41 pm

hell girl I'm in ur club...I focus everything we do with bathroom locations....was never happier to see a portapotty at our remote fishing location....

Some don't think like we think and because we look and act "normal" they forget about our extra baggage.....

Do you boo always

Tracy

Wed Jul 27, 2022 8:04 pm


Mayoman wrote:

Hi Eefy ....I hope evertthing came out all right  !! 🤭😜...Magoo ☘

Fine as wine!

Wed Jul 27, 2022 8:10 pm

Thanks, all. I have to say, my husband is actually one of the most supportive people in my life. He understands when I have to burp my bag, when I need to empty before we go and empty before we leave. He has even volunteered to go into a bathroom after I do when I forget my odor drops so people will think he was the one who "dealt it". THAT is true love......I'm so used to this life of mine and have accepted my differences. It just hit me a little differently today, the unique challenges we face that no one else could really understand, except for people who have those same challenges. Thank you, stoma soulmates.

Wed Jul 27, 2022 8:14 pm


eefyjig wrote:

Fine as wine!

😜...Good !!  There are many advantages to our Plastic Appendage ...for the Male of the Species we happily Never have to sit  !!  Aren't you jealous 😜😋😁 Magoo ☘

Thu Jul 28, 2022 12:37 am


eefyjig wrote:

Thanks, all. I have to say, my husband is actually one of the most supportive people in my life. He understands when I have to burp my bag, when I need to empty before we go and empty before we lea...

Happy wife, happy life so they say. 😁 

Thu Jul 28, 2022 12:48 am


wrote:

Hence why I have no friends. 😞 Although I’m fine with it-I actually have huge social anxiety anyways so I’m comfortable doing my own thing but I hear you -most don’t “get it”

You having a stoma caused all your pre-stoma friends to disassociate themselves from you once you got your stoma? 

Thu Jul 28, 2022 1:21 am


Homie With A Stomie NS wrote:

hell girl I'm in ur club...I focus everything we do with bathroom locations....was never happier to see a portapotty at our remote fishing location....

Some don't think like we think and because w...

The best part about me getting my ostomy is NOT having to have the gps coordinates of every bathroom wherever I’m at. 👍 Well that and I haven’t stained any underwear in about 18 months. 😬😁 

Thu Jul 28, 2022 7:54 am

Hi all i agree with Alex now that i got an ostomy i dont have to worry about finding a restroom, i dump before i leave the house and i plan my eating before depends on how long i will be gone whether its shopping or music in the park or ATV riding.

Thu Jul 28, 2022 2:50 pm


Mabsie Moll wrote:

I'm new to the ostomy circle, but I'm required to measure my liquid output for the moment. I do feel its easier to just empty into the w.c. rather than a measuring jug! I was out to lunch the other...

Mabsie, we DO take things for granted. Like pooping once a day in the normal manner!

Thu Jul 28, 2022 2:51 pm


AlexT wrote:

The best part about me getting my ostomy is NOT having to have the gps coordinates of every bathroom wherever I’m at. 👍 Well that and I haven’t stained any underwear in about 18 months. 😬...

🤣!

Thu Jul 28, 2022 2:53 pm


ron in mich wrote:

Hi all i agree with Alex now that i got an ostomy i dont have to worry about finding a restroom, i dump before i leave the house and i plan my eating before depends on how long i will be gone wheth...

I am usually in that boat, too,  but my output has changed with my gallstones and I’m unusually liquidy and heavy. Hopefully it’s just situational and I go back to normal after my surgery.

Thu Jul 28, 2022 5:15 pm


Mayoman wrote:

😜...Good !!  There are many advantages to our Plastic Appendage ...for the Male of the Species we happily Never have to sit  !!  Aren't you jealous 😜😋😁 Magoo ☘

Haha! I have been known to "hover" over the toilet in unsavory places - it's a good workout!

Mon Aug 01, 2022 3:23 am

Hi Eefyjig  and all  my other ostomy pals...   I have my ileostmy overy 60 years....since I was 15.....   All I wanted wa s to get out of the hospital ( with my stoma) and get back to school, and  teenage life ( after 4  y ears of being sick)..   I did anything I wanted to do....    swam in the ocean,   used disgusting bathrooms with no doors ( at beaches and public parks)....When I went to china,  my girlfriend got sick....and the bus had to stop for her to find a bathroom   (  she soiled her pants)  ,   I filled my po uch....    I swam in the Dead sea, in  Israel, and my whole pouch popped off, due to the high salinity of t he water..  That was a mess......but the showers were private, adn I always have tape...    I flew all around the country, Mexico and carribean, in  a single engine plane....no bathroom, and only once did we have to land on  a dirt  air strip in a cornfield, for me to find a bathroom...    On road trips......just pulled off the road, and dug a hole   in the woods....an d left it to t he wildlife to figure o ut..   At  74.....   I'm not as anxious to be that adventurous....more so because it's not so easy to bend......   but I didn't let t hings  hold me back.  either...    I guess the most disgusting , is when my girlfriend forgot about me.....locked in a closet, with a bucket on a sightseeing water taxie/   in China..   She started talking to someone else.....     Definitely not  fun!    But I survived it  and regret nothing...    Best of luck to all of you...   and most of all Enjoy life.....   Marsha...

Mon Aug 01, 2022 8:34 am


Immarsh wrote:

Hi Eefyjig  and all  my other ostomy pals...   I have my ileostmy overy 60 years....since I was 15.....   All I wanted wa s to get out of the hospital ( with my stoma) and get back to school,...

Marsha, what a great attitude and what life experiences. You made my day! 🥰

Mon Aug 01, 2022 7:34 pm


eefyjig wrote:

I just used one!

It’s hard to gauge what you’ll need when you go out. I went to a park concert couple weeks ago with 2 friends. All was fine till we left and my pouch filled up like a helium balloon. I tried walking 10 feet ahead of them and quickly ‘burped.’ My friend walks up and says “Man it stinks here.” 

Tue Aug 02, 2022 1:35 pm


Mabsie Moll wrote:

I'm new to the ostomy circle, but I'm required to measure my liquid output for the moment. I do feel its easier to just empty into the w.c. rather than a measuring jug! I was out to lunch the other...

Yep when people don't have health issues they takes life for granted, cancer change my life in the way of what I eat,drink live life not to complain but to give God thanks for every little things that I  accomplish, it's a privilege. 

* Please, do not post contact information, personal information or advertising.
All times are GMT - 5 Hours