I have been dealing with cancer for 10 years. I lost my bladder in 2011, both breasts and kidney in 2016. I was on SSI receiving a few dollars a month, but most importantly, Medicaid. It wasn't the best insurance, but I was able to see doctors. My husband took on a second job which he did not need and put me over the income level. The sad thing is he did it on purpose because he was embarrassed that his wife was on assistance. I had no choice, and he was unable to care for me, so what was I to do? It took 3 years of waiting and going before a judge, but I was awarded disability. I lost it all in July last year. I applied for Social Security, which I start getting in June. The amount is ridiculously small and still not enough for any insurance. I have to wait until I turn 65. I have 3 years and I'm not sure my health will hold on. I've missed 3 scans and am terrified. Waiting until health problems are bad enough to go to the ER will be too late. I don't know how to reconcile what my own husband did to me. He laughs about it. My body and spirit are broken. I used to be the happiest person on earth, now all I do is cry. How does one get past this? I am lost and don't know what to do.