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The Toilet Paper Contest

Posted by fdcaptain971, on Fri Jul 31, 2020 11:03 pm

The local "Hog For Bargains" grocery store was one of a select few picked by a manufacturer of a new brand of toilet paper that had yet to be named. The manufacturer asked the selected stores to hold a contest asking customers to try a free 4-pack of the new toilet paper. The customer was to return no later than 3pm on July 31st and submit a name for consideration based on the customer's review and feedback of the new product. If the customer's suggested name was picked as the winner, a $1000 prize would be awarded. In addition, the manager of the particular store where the customer shopped would also receive a $1000 prize.

As you can imagine, this generated quite a bit of excitement among the customers and the store managers. One of the customers who frequented "Hog For Bargains", who was known as Old Harry, was cantankerous and generally disagreeable with everyone. It took quite a bit of coaxing on the part of the store manager to get Old Harry to participate. The manager reasoned that the more customers he had in the contest, the better his chances would be of winning $1000 for himself. After about 10 minutes of back and forth, he finally got Old Harry to agree to participate in the naming contest. Old Harry got his free 4-pack and was reminded that the contest ended at 3pm on July 31st.

The big day arrived and many suggestions had been turned in. Some of the suggestions for the new product were names like "Floral Fields of Fragrance", "Nature's Touch", "Cottony Delight", "Soft and Soothing", "Wipe N' Clean", "Caress", "Pamper Butt", etc.

As 3pm approached, there was still no sign of Old Harry. Finally at 2:59pm, Old Harry sauntered in the door, walked back to the contest table, and slammed down 3 unused rolls of the 4-pack. The manager was a little surprised and asked Old Harry what was wrong.

Old Harry said,"Didn't like it."

The manager said, "Well, I'm sorry to hear that. So I guess you didn't bother to suggest a name for it then?"

Old Harry replied, "Yeah, I've got a name for it all right."

The manager said, "Well what would that be?"

Old Harry scoffed and loudly stated, "I'd call this stuff John Wayne toilet paper."

The manager was slightly taken aback and said, "John Wayne toilet paper? Why would you call it that?"

In an even louder voice, Old Harry said, " Because this stuff won't take shit off of anybody!"

 

 

Reply by w30bob, on Fri Jul 31, 2020 11:28 pm

I want to know who named the grocery store "Hog for Bargains"???

;0)

Bob

Reply by lovely, on Sat Aug 01, 2020 12:16 am

Good story thanks for sharing. Best wishes and stay safe

Reply by kmedup, on Sat Aug 01, 2020 11:09 pm
w30bob wrote:

I want to know who named the grocery store "Hog for Bargains"???

;0)

Bob


When I took a drive around the US, I just had to take a photo of a grocery store called, "Piggly Wiggly."  I actually had to back up as I was driving by the store just to check that it really was that name. Then I went inside to buy something. Imagine:)K

Reply by w30bob, on Sat Aug 01, 2020 11:58 pm

Hi Sis,

  Piggly Wiggly is famous! They were the first grocery store here in the States that allowed customers to go into the store and pick out their own stuff......and they invented the Shopping Cart!! Think about how much fun (and stupid shit) you've done with shopping carts!  Yeah Piggly!

Regards,

Bob

Reply by kmedup, on Sun Aug 02, 2020 12:41 am
w30bob wrote:

Hi Sis,

  Piggly Wiggly is famous! They were the first grocery store here in the States that allowed customers to go into the store and pick out their own stuff......and they invented the Shopping Cart!! Think about how much fun (and stupid shit) you've done with shopping carts!  Yeah Piggly!

Regards,

Bob

I purchased my first box of instant grits at a Piggly Wiggly.  Now here's a summer project for you - transform a shopping cart;)K


Reply by Newbie Dana, on Fri Aug 07, 2020 9:29 pm

Piggly Wiggly was most famous for its design - a customer had to go down one aisle and up the next, and so on, until he went down every aisle to get to the checkout counters at the end. Hence the name - it looked like the path of a wiggly pig to get from start to finish!

Reply by kmedup, on Fri Aug 07, 2020 10:26 pm
Newbie Dana wrote:

Piggly Wiggly was most famous for its design - a customer had to go down one aisle and up the next, and so on, until he went down every aisle to get to the checkout counters at the end. Hence the name - it looked like the path of a wiggly pig to get from start to finish!

Thanks for the explanation; I love hearing stories such as this.  It makes me want to get on the road again and explore the highways and byways of small-town North America.  Karen

Reply by Silveradokid, on Sat Aug 08, 2020 6:48 pm

Judge Judy references Piggly Wiggly when illustrating certain legal points to her 'courtroom'...

 

Silveradokid 

Reply by w30bob, on Sun Aug 09, 2020 9:18 pm
kmedup wrote:
w30bob wrote:

Hi Sis,

  Piggly Wiggly is famous! They were the first grocery store here in the States that allowed customers to go into the store and pick out their own stuff......and they invented the Shopping Cart!! Think about how much fun (and stupid shit) you've done with shopping carts!  Yeah Piggly!

Regards,

Bob

I purchased my first box of instant grits at a Piggly Wiggly.  Now here's a summer project for you - transform a shopping cart;)K


Now Sis............are you suggesting we each steal a shopping cart?  They're very expensive.......if you get caught.  I'm surprised at you....although I do have a Walmart vest.  Yeah, I stole it.  I usually wear it to very high level important business meetings.  Seems to break the tension. I never thought of getting wheeled into the meeting room sitting in a shopping cart though!  Brilliant!!  Mom always said you were the smart one.  

;0)

bob

Reply by kmedup, on Mon Aug 10, 2020 12:31 am
w30bob wrote:
kmedup wrote:
w30bob wrote:

Hi Sis,

  Piggly Wiggly is famous! They were the first grocery store here in the States that allowed customers to go into the store and pick out their own stuff......and they invented the Shopping Cart!! Think about how much fun (and stupid shit) you've done with shopping carts!  Yeah Piggly!

Regards,

Bob

I purchased my first box of instant grits at a Piggly Wiggly.  Now here's a summer project for you - transform a shopping cart;)K


Now Sis............are you suggesting we each steal a shopping cart?  They're very expensive.......if you get caught.  I'm surprised at you....although I do have a Walmart vest.  Yeah, I stole it.  I usually wear it to very high level important business meetings.  Seems to break the tension. I never thought of getting wheeled into the meeting room sitting in a shopping cart though!  Brilliant!!  Mom always said you were the smart one.  

;0)

bob

Yeah - but mom always liked you best. I have "mom" and you in my thoughts; I know it is tough going.

And I have sort of borrowed a shopping cart or two already - to go those 3 blocks - feeling guilty all the way and looking over my shoulder ... all the while hoping someone needs it to push TO the grocery store. I even have a few A&W trays by accident. :) Your sis in that other country

Baw
Reply by Baw, on Mon Aug 10, 2020 12:37 am
w30bob wrote:

I want to know who named the grocery store "Hog for Bargains"???

;0)

Bob


Piggly wiggly is for real but they didn't invent the shopping cart!  That honor, a patent, and Lots of money went to Silvan Goldman of Oklahoma City.

baw

Reply by w30bob, on Mon Aug 10, 2020 4:19 pm
Baw wrote:
w30bob wrote:

I want to know who named the grocery store "Hog for Bargains"???

;0)

Bob


Piggly wiggly is for real but they didn't invent the shopping cart!  That honor, a patent, and Lots of money went to Silvan Goldman of Oklahoma City.

baw

Hi Baw,

  Yup......my bad.  It was the Humpty Dumpty chain of stores that was the first to use Goldman's shopping cart, not Piggly Wiggly.  Piggly provided customers with baskets, not carts.........and initially charged them a few cents to use them.  Just like Aldi's does today (except you get your quarter back).  Fun stuff.

 

later,

bob

Baw
Reply by Baw, on Mon Aug 10, 2020 4:59 pm
w30bob wrote:
Baw wrote:
w30bob wrote:

I want to know who named the grocery store "Hog for Bargains"???

;0)

Bob


Piggly wiggly is for real but they didn't invent the shopping cart!  That honor, a patent, and Lots of money went to Silvan Goldman of Oklahoma City.

baw

Hi Baw,

  Yup......my bad.  It was the Humpty Dumpty chain of stores that was the first to use Goldman's shopping cart, not Piggly Wiggly.  Piggly provided customers with baskets, not carts.........and initially charged them a few cents to use them.  Just like Aldi's does today (except you get your quarter back).  Fun stuff.

 

later,

bob

Long before I started recruiting Medical Physicists I found clerical staff for companies. One day, much to my surprise, I got a call from Goldman Enterprises.  This was back in the late 80's, I think.  It seems that Mr Goldman, and elderly man, needed a new chauffeur.  Wellll, he had to be youngish, well spoken, have a clean personal background and a good driving record.  They didn't say that he needed to be Black but it was strongly implied. The salary was exceptional for the times.

Baw

Reply by w30bob, on Wed Aug 12, 2020 11:38 am
Baw wrote:
w30bob wrote:
Baw wrote:
w30bob wrote:

I want to know who named the grocery store "Hog for Bargains"???

;0)

Bob


Piggly wiggly is for real but they didn't invent the shopping cart!  That honor, a patent, and Lots of money went to Silvan Goldman of Oklahoma City.

baw

Hi Baw,

  Yup......my bad.  It was the Humpty Dumpty chain of stores that was the first to use Goldman's shopping cart, not Piggly Wiggly.  Piggly provided customers with baskets, not carts.........and initially charged them a few cents to use them.  Just like Aldi's does today (except you get your quarter back).  Fun stuff.

 

later,

bob

Long before I started recruiting Medical Physicists I found clerical staff for companies. One day, much to my surprise, I got a call from Goldman Enterprises.  This was back in the late 80's, I think.  It seems that Mr Goldman, and elderly man, needed a new chauffeur.  Wellll, he had to be youngish, well spoken, have a clean personal background and a good driving record.  They didn't say that he needed to be Black but it was strongly implied. The salary was exceptional for the times.

Baw

Wow.  

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