DIETICIANS NO MORE KNOW WHAT THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT than politicians, economists, conspiracy nutcases, or tarot card readers. For decades, they’ve been selling the general public all this malarkey about there being five food groups: fruits/veggies, carbs, proteins, dairy, and fats/oils. They have made dietary surveillance overly complicated in order to sell more books, get more TV shows, and generally pretend to be experts at something that really isn’t that complex. THERE ARE REALLY ONLY TWO FOOD GROUPS: stuff that’s good for you, and stuff that isn’t. As a general rule, the stuff that’s good for you varies between practically unpalatable and depressingly distasteful. On the other hand, stuff that’s not good for you almost always tastes great. Thus we’re presented with one of life’s biggest quandaries: what should I be eating? All the essential enigmas of life are encompassed in this basic mystery. It is at the very crux of all epistemological, ontological, philosophical, and theological inquires. What should I be eating? Stuff that’s good for me, but tastes crappy? Or stuff that’s not good for me, but tastes great? Broccoli or cinnamon buns? Cabbage or corn dogs? A bottle of water or a bottle of diet cola? How could God have screwed up so badly and made only stuff that’s bad for us tasty? And what circle of hell are dieticians consigned to when they croak?
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Your stoma doesn't have to get in the way of sampling local cuisine and activities when you're on vacation.
Check out our travel tips on diet and fitness.
Check out our travel tips on diet and fitness.