No, your stoma should not be painful. Period. The skin around it is a different matter, but I think you're asking about the funny red thing poking thru your gut, not the skin around it. If your stoma is painful it's a sign that something is wrong. You need to get in contact with the folks in a large teaching hospital........to let some people who knows what the hell they're doing check you out. You could very well be risking your chance of ever getting a reversal if things get progressively worse.
I find most smaller hospital are reluctant to send patients to other areas or hospitals for fear of getting a bad reputation of not being able to deal with any issue. So they deal with folks like you as best they can and hope for the best. That's a terrible recipe for success. Just FYI............cancer doesn't "burst thru" intestine........it's grows thru it. I don't even want to speculate what's going on inside your gut, but you need to get it figured out ASAP, and hopefully it's just something minor. Luckily, today you can set up online tele-appointments with Docs anywhere, and most will easily agree to talk with you if you're not close. They can also let you get scanned or imaged locally and have the data sent to their radiologists for analysis. They'll probably want to see you at some point, but I find they're incredibly flexible now-a-days. So first make a list of the places with the specialists you want to see.......whether that's Gastroenterology or Oncology or what. Pick some places that do it all, as you don't know which direction this could go. Texas has loads of good hospitals, with U of T's MD Anderson in Houston and U of T's Southwestern in Dallas coming to mind. Baylor has hospitals in both locations as well. So just depends where you are in the great state of TX. So check with your insurance company and see who's in network, or however they deal with that.......and start making some tele-appointments. Depending on what's ailing you.........time may not be your friend here. Now GIT! girlie!!