Ostomy Memories of Charlton Heston


AS I WAS WALKING THE OTHER DAY, I caught up to an old guy going my direction and damn if it wasn’t Charlton Heston.  “I thought you were dead,” I told him.  “You can’t kill Moses,” he said theatrically.  “You sure played some great characters,” I offered.  “That I did,” Heston declaimed, his chin in the air.  “I liked Ben Hur,” I told him, “but I think my favorite was the astronaut in ‘Planet of the Apes.’”  Heston rubbed his chin whiskers and looked pensive.  “That was a good film,” he said.  We were going slightly downhill when we stopped at an intersection.  “Did you ever get injured doing any of your films?” I asked him.  “Not really.  I was always a pretty tough guy,” Heston boasted.  That reminded me that the last time I’d seen him was raising a rifle into the air at an NRA convention.  “You were a tough character, for sure,” I agreed, “but I notice you’re not carrying that rifle anymore.”  Heston let out a loud breath and frowned.  Then he said, rather sheepishly, I thought:  “Those bastards pried it from my cold, dead hands.”  


Henry, I'm surprised you attended a gun convention for the NRA. Never thought you'd be packin' heat.

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Reply to AlexT

I saw it on TV.  I wouldn't go within five miles of an NRA anything.  

Reply to HenryM

I know, and don't blame you. I own plenty of guns and they annoy me a lot. I just had to use your wording to poke fun.


Seeing that you were on friendly terms with Charlton Heston, Henry, who do you think played the better Marc Antony, Heston or Marlon Brando? Many issues raised in that play, the nature of power and morality among them, and a question more relevant to our part of the world than to yours, when does a ruler become a tyrant? Here is an answer to which is your favourite Julius Caesar: The Caesar Salad!

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Reply to bowsprit

I've not seen either Brando's or Heston's take on the Marc Antony role.  But just generally, I would say Heston's acting was wooden compared to the incomparable Brando.  As for Caesar salads, I wholeheartedly agree, especially if I can plop a few anchovies in there.   

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