Okay, we all know dating can be hard. Some of us have insecurities. However, ever wonder if your insecurities leaked? For example, if one has a limp, it's visible. It's acceptable. To talk about anxiety disorder (GAD) was taboo 20 years ago....ya I was a little one back then. The strides we made about domestic violence are more prevalent today than 20 years ago. Bullying, there is more awareness. I remember growing up and not being the biggest, and you just shrugged it off. Panic attacks were taboo as well. They were intangible, something you can't CT or MRI. The awareness for all those made more sociologically acceptable. However, the scars that remain whether you're living with an appliance or scars from surgery, can still be left. In these cases, a lot, especially young, will hide it. Like it's an abomination. Almost like Bruce Wayne to Batman or Clark Kent to Superman, some of us are compelled to hide our true scars or wounds which does have an impact on identity.
Now before I go on, don't think I am speaking for the masses, I am not. However, reality hit me. I know I wrote a long blog about "Food For Thought, Dating, an Actual convo", it related primarily to dating. I gave advice on my experiences. Unlike some of the above disorders or afflictions (you decide) it kinda feels taboo to talk about these surgeries.....Hence why some are here and other sites, to connect. To have a better understanding. However, in some ways, even though outgoing one can be, one can be afflicted with people knowing. I got so many emails with dating. I appreciate those who read or those I could help. Now let's regroup.......What if your disorder was given out? Have you changed your ways? I have to write this because well it's late my time lol, and you will see most my blogs follow like that. Dating can be an obvious issue of insecurity, even by ding dong, "Alpha Males" like me, so to speak......Again, the question remains what if your condition, which is sensitive leaks out?
Basically where I am going with this.....Gear up! lol. I was talking to this girl for quite some time...of course I mentioned nothing and kind of followed advice I gave on previous blog I wrote. We all strive for health, but love...everyone deserves. However heroic for some to come out to someone about their conditions, some will find out. Run down....Basically the girl I was talking to, told friends about my prior surgery. How do I know? Well, it got thrown in my face. A friend of the girl I was talking to, call her Miss X (no pun intended) is bipolar, socially accepted and should be. However, basically threatened to kill my life. Two days later I got assaulted by a male, sucker punched twice while sitting on a porch in the midst of night...You guessed it? Her ex. Now, by my size most people think I am a fighter, by all means I used to box. However, The wounds I carry make me a different fighter. I fought for my life, as many of you may have due to conditions. So the ex's friend took her phone called me and threatened my life by saying she was at a bar crying over me.......Not true, she was home. 3 days later I get assaulted. A car rolled up, didn't think anything of it, and was talking on a porch (sitting down). Before I know it, two sucker punches full blast to my face. I stood up, he took off.....
The friend of Miss X, I saw her out, she has been stalking me lol. She brought her boyfriend and said fake stuff, and he yelled out, where's your old bag!!! So I know she told her friends duh, and it was around friends...Now why would one want to fight someone with a prior illness? It's taboo and screwy. Friends wanted me to fight...they said what happened to the old Rick Bitty (again feel free to hit me up on that name, it's on a popular site...all of you). Well, I am not the same person. I knew the old me would want to tear his head off...lol. But I knew the girl was playing games. However, look it's A BAD VERSION OF JERSEY SHORE...but what if it was to leak out, your insecurities, is my point. ....
I thought about this.....N said, you know what...so what if they do. When a fight almost broke out, over ten people came out to stop it. My bud says, now you know who your real friends are, being many. One of them was bipolar (medicated). This girl who started it...not so much medicated, not so much....But to my point. See it makes you think differently. Some of us are so prone to hide it, or how do I tell a date? Well the girl knew, but I never said a word. N that touched me more than the blows to my face (sucker punched). Back to my point cause I feel I am going ADD with this one....What if it was known you had a surgery or appliance? Answer: Okay. I broke a facial bone on the assault, wasn't looking when I got hit. However, the hit that hurt the worst was using my previous problems and current to insult me. So now I know it's out. However, I realized it's still taboo.
Guys or gals what I am saying is mine was forced out, and I handled it, it hurt me inside. However, back to the dating thing... Some people don't care, being they see you. This goes back to my dating approach on a previous blog. However, I hope no one gets their insecurities out like I had to. See most of us got humbled by problems. Where others get humbled by egos. So, if this has happened to you, I'm sorry. People don't see your triumph, dedication, and perseverance to stand up to something that you may keep secret. I thought I'd write this and expose myself, many of you might feel lost, hurt, asking why me....especially at the beginning. However, overcome. Okay I was going to write about weight lifting and how for some to put on mass. It's late, and I'll probably write about it later. In all scenarios, confidence is key..whether via dating, dealing with what I dealt with lol, rudeness, or getting some of your health back. So feel free to comment. I am sorry if this blog is long and a little scattered I am tired. But I know some of you might have had yourself exposed rudely or a bad relationship, or a victim of assault. Please proceed with confidence, and stand up. Also, again...you are NOT your illness. Again, times can be rough and health is what you need. However, some love and understanding is what you should all strive for. Also shows you insecurities we can all share. In that, I hope you all find it....which will lead me into tips for mass. To help some insecurities....Now it's not like everyone knows of my surgery. Just a few. Good day or night - Dcrazy AKA Rick Bitty. Again feel free to add me, if I know you're from here.
Food for thought! Dating....can be found on my blogs or here, since dating can be rough at times: http://www.meetanostomate.org/index.php?page=blog&action=viewdetailed&view_id=1234&id=1330