How can people understand

HOW CAN PEOPLE UNDERSTAND.

How can people understand
without experiencing first-hand.
All the subtle ins and outs
of what an ostomy’s about.

They don’t know what it’s like for us
and do not understand the fuss.
They just sit upon the loo
and go about their normal poo.

They don’t know what it’s like for me
‘cos they don’t have an ostomy.
Can folk ever really get it
if they can have a ‘normal’ shit.

This thing that is attached to me,
this thing that’s called an ostomy.
This thing could drive you round the bend
so how could others comprehend.

‘I’ sometimes question if it’s real
so no one else knows how I feel.
It’s hard for folk to really know
unless they have their own to show.

With all the angst and all the strife,
the losing of a ‘normal’ life.
You feel like one of just a few
and other folks don’t have a clue.

There’s some who really want to care
but even they have not been there.
So even with their caring stance
they’re acting out of ignorance.

I hate to just pontificate
it’s up to us to educate.
Let people know what to expect
and let us show our SELF-respect.

B. Withers 2012

Great post, as usual, Bill. I like what you say about sharing expectations and showing self-respect. I am sure many of us can be a little uncomfortable in our initial interaction with people with exceptional physical or mental characteristics; and we therefore tend to take our cues on understanding through the messages they deliver, especially how they feel about their condition. For example, we feel a lot more at ease when they exhibit positive and sincere attitudes. So, what message does each of us want to deliver? All of us are different and no single message is effective or appropriate for all. This message works for me. My ostomy is not the problem; rather, it's the solution to years of suffering with ulcerative colitis. I am grateful that my ostomy has given me the freedom to live a much more active and productive life. I may unload a little differently, but...get over it! I did. People will accept others more readily who are comfortable in their own skin. As you say, Bill, let's show our self-respect. PB

Hello Primeboy. Thanks for the post. It is always appreciated when people comment on the verses as there is no other way that I get feedback. Like yourself I am, for the most part, 'grateful' for my ostomy as it has freed me from the hassles that led up to the surgery. Nonetheless, there is still that part of me that would have preferred not to have had to go down this route in the first place. Many of my verses are simple responses to things other people have said, that stimulate my memories of past modes of thinking. I feel priviledged to be able to now reflect on experiences and feelings with that wonderous advantage of hindsight. I entirely agree with you that no single message is appropriate to all, which is why I do like to read your posts as they contain many of the things I would like to say if I (only) had those skills in writng prose that you obviously have. Best wishes Bill

Whether through poetry or prose, art or music, talk or thought, we all need time out to process our experiences and make some sense of our situation. Our forum here is more than just a common sounding board with fellow travelers. I see it as a first-class resource for dialogue and support with kindred spirits who share issues, solutions, and values. Socrates said that the unexamined life was not worth living. I think he would agree that there's room for some collaboration in this effort. Happy New Year!

Very well put Primeboy and best wishes for the New Year to you also.

How to Get Back to Activity after Ostomy Surgery with Kimberly | Hollister

Very eloquent bill.

Thank you Ron and best wishes for the new year. Bill

Great!!!

Thanks horsegurl it's good for me to have this sort of feedback as it is a motivating force to think about writing some more about the subject.Thanks also for your periodic feedback on your own situation as this has also motivated some other types of verses. However, as they do not seem suitable for posting to this site you probably would not get a chance to read them. Maybe, one day I'll get the hang of the technology and publish them as an ebook! Best wishes Bill