Hi there Ostomy friends,
For a short but troubling time recently, I experienced an unusual (happily) downturn in my mood and general disposition; in plain English, I simply felt like shit!!! There appeared to be no distinct or logical reason for this dramatic swing in my mood. My butt was giving me some trouble, leaking some stinky stuff (de-functioned J-Pouch), but this is not really new to me, but it hurt a little more than usual. This never sent me into a temporary black abyss in the past, I just padded my butt and went about my day.
For a week or so, my mood only became darker, very disconcerting indeed. I suspect that my sleep was not as deep and sound as it appeared to be, possibly. Self-doubt and insecurity ruled for those days, and I really had no idea why.
Then a true friend, a Princess on her white horse, came crashing through the gloom and the fog and rescued me. She did not tell me to "snap out of it" or "just get on with it".
This warm, sweet lady read my overly long emails, listened (email) to my moaning as I tried to get my state of mind in a better place and begin to feel good about myself again. Her responses were always encouraging and uplifting and slowly penetrated the gloomy cloud that had descended on my self-esteem. I had been feeling like Linus from Peanuts, the cloud had been over my head, following me everywhere, with no apparent cause.
I have family around me, but I live alone, but I could not share my moody feelings with family because they might get the idea that I was what you might call "despondent"; this term carries much baggage and does NOT apply to me.
I have been exchanging emails with this lady for many months and have really enjoyed our time online, but her patience and her bright, calm outlook on life is extraordinary, and she is a true inspiration.
My friend embodies the true spirit of this site and its reason for being, to help each other even when we might try our collective and individual patience at times. She has a talent for saying just the right words exactly when they are needed, exuding a calmness that is captivating and contagious. Well, some of that calmness has been gifted to me just from her emails, and I hope that I can do the same for her someday, although I really don't think she would ever need it.
You know who you are, J, and I am eternally grateful for your friendship.
I have found the true meaning of friendship and of this site and wanted to encourage everyone not to be discouraged by someone's gloomy mood, usually it's just a passing phase, and there is always some sunshine, just waiting for the clouds of gloom to lift.
Thank you, J, from the bottom of my heart.
Magoo XX
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