Hi shoots, Not sure where you're going with this but it's an interesting question. If we didn't have feelings we would all be walking around like robots. Never be happy, never be sad, never experience those first few moments of falling in love, or being attracted to someone (you know - that magnetism you just can't describe or understand but it's there), never feel heartache, never feel joy at the simplest thing, or excitement over something extraordinary. I could go on, but I'm sure you get the message here. If all the negative feelings were gone and all that's left is happy feelings - we'd just be a bunch of Stepford people. That's pretty boring too, in my opinion. It would bring a whole new meaning to the age old question "Why are we here?" - but then, no one would give a damn would they. So, to answer the topic title question - yes, I am of the strong opinion feelings are important. At times they do need to be controlled or we would all be insane or be in prison for killing or be in trouble for stalking someone because we just couldn't let go of feelings they can not return.
Negative about my situation. Well, I am negative about this surgery, about having this bag. Mostly because it's a pain in the ass to maintain, has added something to my life that I have to take care of when I felt I was coming to a point in my life where I could reduce all responsibility to a minimum. It's one more medical thing I have to watch to make sure it stays healthy. And I was told AFTER the stupid surgery it may not have really gotten rid of the cancer - just will keep it at bay for a few years. It's unpredictable, looks horrid (not just the bag but the red thing sticking out of my belly) and makes me look like I have a tumor on my belly even in loose tops and it's uncomfortable most times. For those of us who like to walk around in our birthday suits some days - it's really not a pretty sight so kinda puts the damper on the enjoyment of that. It took almost 6 months for the pain of the surgery to subside and during those months there were many days I'd open my eyes and groan to the powers that be why won't you let me go, this is too much ! I'm tired of it all, it's too exhausting, I don't want all these doctors, treatments, problems anymore. I could go on but will stop. I'm sure you get the idea here also. But I am coming to terms with it and trying to find ways to make it not so intrusive, little-by-little I'm succeeding.
This does not make me negative about the other parts of my life. I have never been a negative person. But I can't say I have been a positive person either. (Meaning no matter what shit is hitting the fan I can smile and say wonderful things. I have a sister like that, she kinda irritates me sometimes.) I have always been a moody person - but usually looked for the good in a situation after brooding about it for a day or two. I was a different person in my younger years than I am today and I'm sure, if I make it much longer, I will be a different person in my 70's than I am now. Life contours what you become or who you are on any given day. Life is challenging from the day we are born. Think about that: we had to learn to walk, talk, etc. There are things we take for granted that, at some point in our life, we really had to work at to achieve. Sometimes there is no choice except to do or die.
There are people who are negative, crabby people - but then we really don't know what happened in their life to make them that way. There are people who are so happy they make you look at them like they are from outer space. Yay for them ! But I don't believe any of us are born negative or positive. Life dictates our feelings and that changes with the losses and victories we experience. Which means, to me, our feelings will be different depending on our age and what we are experiencing or have experienced at any given time in our life.
To me this surgery/stoma was a difficult challenge over the past year. Not necessarily because I was worried if I would meet a significant other (even though I am still trying to imagine how certain things are going to happen with it in a relationship) but because, as I said, it hurts, its messy, it's not at all what I want to wake up to everyday. But it's becoming more of a chore now than a challenge.
In your topic you are asking generalized questions about peoples feelings about their life and are also asking isolated questions about their feelings of living with an ostomy. This would of been an excellent question for the forum I belonged to in my younger years (heehee). I hope I've given you some things to think about for both questions. This was actually fun for me - thanks!