The captain's parrot

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mild_mannered_super_hero
A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week,
so the magician did the same tricks over and over again.
There was one problem. The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and
began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once he understood,
he started shouting in the middle of the show "Look, it's not the same
hat!" or, "Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table," or "Hey, why are
all the cards the ace of spades?"
The magician was furious, but couldn't do anything. It was, after all, the
captain's parrot. Then the ship sank.
The magician found himself on a piece of wood in the middle of the sea
with, as fate would have it, the parrot.
They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word. This went
on for a day and then another and then another.
Finally on the fourth day, the parrot could not hold back and said,
"OK, I give up. Where's the f***ing ship?"
;
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DonBrown1943

Very good!

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DonBrown1943

An elderly spinster once accepted the gift of a parrot from a pet store because the parrot had been previously owned by a salty sea captain and only knew salty sea curses. The pet shop owner hoped the lady could retrain the parrot. She tried for weeks, but every time she would ask, "Polly want a cracker?" the parrot would respond with, "hell, no, I don't want a f*coming cracker, you dried-up old b*tch!" This went on for weeks. Finally, the dear old lady grabbed the parrot and threw him in her freezer, exclaiming "This will teach you not to curse!" She had quite forgotten her Thanksgiving turkey was in there.

After about ten minutes, she opened the freezer and got the parrot out. He asked her, in a very subdued and masterly fashion," Might I ask one question?" Quite pleased, she said," Yes, you may." He responded very nervously," Just exactly what did the turkey say?"

mild_mannered_super_hero

thanks for the reply, glad you enjoyed it.

winnie

jajaja..good one

 
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winnie

Don..that was funny..lol

DonBrown1943

Thanks, Winnie. I love MMSH's jokes and thought I would tell him an old one to go with his. Thanks for your comment.

harleyrider

They're both really funny-thanks guys

DonBrown1943

Shareholder, someday when I'm riding again, I would love to take my first ride to the east and meet you, maybe explore a little of the east for me. You can see my Softail Heritage Classic on my photos on my profile page. My wife loves to ride behind me but we've never been on a really long ride. Still, Might be fun.

DonBrown1943

Harleyrider, my first post was supposed to be addressed to you. Spellchecker changed Harleyrider to Shareholder just as I posted it. Sorry about that.

harleyrider


Hey no problem-Nice looking Heritage . I'm running a black demin '06 Street Bob. Wife loves to ride nbspon the back for short trips also .   nbsp; nbsp;Look forward to you getting better and back on the bike. nbsp; nbsp; nbsp;I'm planning on retiring in the  next couple of months and moving to the Charlottesville Virginia area-about 20 minutes from the Blue Ridge Parkway.Hope to get a LOT more riding in nbsp; LOL

nbsp;If you get east -give a shout

Pat

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