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Trying to understand

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Sat Aug 25, 2018 1:58 am

im really trying to understand why on this site no one is interested in chatting or meeting a new friend with the same issues, are you all just waiting for mr America! Just don’t get it!

Sat Aug 25, 2018 2:58 am

just like your post here if you put down a time that you are in the chat you might get a responce.  plus if you are a free member its harder for you to chat with a member

Sat Aug 25, 2018 3:38 am

Hello Jet759. I can understand your frustration about the chatroom as I tried a number of times to see if there was anyone on there, without success. One of the problems was the difference in time zones between the USA and the UK. Also, the only time I get to come on here is first thing in the morning and then it is only for a short period before I go to work. It is noticable that there are very few people logged on at the same time as me ( this morning it is just 3 others - including yourself) Occasionally I got lucky and chatted with people but I found it a new and strange experience which did not really suit my style of communication. My 'chatting' is best done on the open forum or on people's blogs. Sometimes people mail me and I am happy to respond but I do feel that it benefits many passive observers on this site if the conversations are public rather than private. 

Right! as you are online, I will try to go into the general chatroom to see if you are there!

Best wishes


Sat Aug 25, 2018 3:50 am

I just tried the chatroom and there were supposedly 2 people in there ( not you!) and they did not answer. Also there were some old messages for me from several people that I obviously missed because I no longer bother going in there. I'm sorry to those folks who it looks as if I ignored.

There was a time when a 'meet-up' in the chatroom  was planned, which was most convenient for thos living in the US. It was too late in the evening for me so I never got the chance to join them. Perhaps this is something you could resurrect by posting on the forum what time you would be available to chat.

Just a thought.

Best wishes


Sat Aug 25, 2018 10:58 am

Hello,  I haven't tried the chat rooms, but if you would like to chat, let me know of a time and I'll try to oblige.  I am still healing from my surgery and mostly sit in my small apartment watching TV and surfing the internet for useful information (and sometimes not so useful)

I would be interested in chatting more.


Sat Aug 25, 2018 12:00 pm

You have placed age and sex (female only) restrictions on your post. You're therefore eliminating a large number

of  potential responders.

Sat Aug 25, 2018 1:11 pm

Hi Jerry!

I too understand your frustration with being able to chat and needing to commiserate with others in the same boat. I know I'm not in the age catagory you're wishing to reach out to, but I AM your neighbor... living in the valley!!! There is an active ostomy support group at Sacred Heart - I'm sure you've already been told. I haven't gone this year - it's hard to put a finger on WHY but it's just my own insecurity. If you'd like to chat or have a friend to talk to, I'm here. There are certainly adjustments to our "new normal" as everyone likes to say but it does get easier. I'm absolutely floored to find out just how many of us "ostomates" are here... not only on this site or in the support group, but discovered through idle conversations. You'll also find that most people are far more understanding than I would have guessed. Yes, there are the sad stories too ~ like spousetypes leaving or not wanting to be a part of the process. I've had my fair share of issues with regard to my husband seeing me as desirable. I must also take responsibility with the fact that it's my own personal perspective, unable to see myself as sexy. Have you had or are you still working with home health care... Providence was a life saver for me!!

Anyway, if you ever want to chat, vent or simply meet a local "friend", let me know. Just remember, you've got this ~ one day soon you'll wonder why any of this seemed like and issue.

Take care of you, Vicki

Mon Aug 27, 2018 2:29 pm


  As all have said, getting people to chat on here is easier said than done.  Most members are free members and cannot initiate private chats or emails.  And, since the mobile format came out, members aren't even aware that chat is done on a separate window or that people are trying to chat with them for that matter.  And then there are the members who are not very tech savy where as others only come onto the site once in a while.  Try not to take it personal if no one responds to your chats or emails.

  But also as stated above, send out a chat invitation in the forums and maybe you'll get a few hits.  Just my 2 cents.



Tue Aug 28, 2018 1:38 am

Hi there jet759

I am a free member so can only use the general chat room..a paying member can initiate a private chat with a free member and they can respond....If we are both online at the same time I would really like to chat with you. I have an Ileostomy.

take care


Thu Aug 30, 2018 12:19 pm

Feel free to text me sometime, it’s way easier for me then this site, if so my number is 509-230-5842–jerry

it would be nice to have someone to talk to that can relate, really hope to hear from you, thanks JT

Thu Aug 30, 2018 12:24 pm

Let me know when you’re online sometime and maybe we can chat,you could also text me sometime five zero nine two three zero five eight four two

Thu Aug 30, 2018 1:29 pm

Well when I come I almost always stop in the general chat room. You know whenever anyone is logged in on this site their name appears in the chat room whether they are in it on not. If you go to the cog wheel on the top right of the chat window you will see options. If you check on chat room sounds you can hear if someone post they you can respond if you chose to. You can also keep the chat room open so you can see if someome posts.

The chatroom is fun if you have the time to hang out and say hello, keep trying.


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