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I'm a 64 year old grandma of 4 just 5 weeks out from emergency colostomy due to a rupture of infection in my colon. It damaged my bladder, uterus, ovary & vagina. I'm feeling very fragile & overwhelmed at this time. I've tried all kinds of appliances from Hollister, Covatec, & Coloplast plus 2 generics. I've tried the one piece, 2 piece, filtered and unfiltered and I just can't get them to stay on for long without pancaking. I've got the convex barrier & flat barrier and use the wax rings they sent me as well as barrier wipes. Just a mere 2 months ago I had never been sick, never taken a pain med of any kind until 5 weeks ago. I feel very traumatized right now so I was searching for support. I randomly came across the post about the people who were attacked on the dating website because they didn't disclose their ostomies up front in their profiles. It just INFURIATED me!! I already feel like I'm having an out of body experience and being a newbie I feel self conscious enough!! I just had a long talk with my husband of 45 years and told him how embarrassed I feel and what a drain I've suddenly become to my family. Thank God he was the one that got me to the hospital in time and he is happy I have the colostomy after seeing me writhing in pain. There are many great guys out there for whom poop is NBD but meeting someone new would be so tricky. I personally am appalled at myself because this shook my self confidence. Not because of my appearance but because it's such a shock to suddenly be so vulnerable. I've always been a free bird never worried about what others thought of me. I wonder how my personality could have changed so dramatically in just over a month ! I have the utmost respect for ostomates bravely seeking romantic relationships. I personally would not be phased and would be glad to date any good, kind person regardless of their disability.(Not that having an ostomy is a disability but to me, I do feel a bit disabled right now.) All that matters is WHO they are as a person. Reading the responses condemning this idiot, especially from the men on this site made me want to be a part of your supportive team!! Though I feel fairly miserable waiting for this painful recovery to pass, It's uplifting to meet wonderful ostomates who are living their lives joyfully. It gives me hope that I'll get through this and be happy & upbeat again soon!!
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