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Donating ostomy supplies to those in need

Posted: Sat Jan 27, 2018 3:19 pm

In dec 2017 LAnthony89 posted stating he was in dire need of supplies as he had suffered a severe loss in a home fire and was supporting a new baby.  I emailed back and forth with him and agreed to send him MANY supplies that I could no longer use, as long as he would pay shipping.  He GUSHED his grateful comments and PROMISED to reimburse the shipping costs of $21.16.  I made it clear I live on a fixed income.  He used an address in OHIO to which UPS delivered the supplies, with notes that they hand delivered them to a man on the porch. "Anthony" no longer responds to emails and never reimbursed the shipping costs, never mind the MANY $$$ worth of supplies for which I never asked for anything in the way of compensation.  BEWARE folks claiming to NEED help with supplies.  Better to donate them to an ostomy group.  At least that way you know they are going to someone who really needs them and not to someone who may just be re-selling them.  Oh and Anthony emailed me telling me he had received those supplies and would mail a money order.  I'm still hanging.  If he should honor his word, I will gladly post that result.

Peace



Last edited by dadnabbit on Sat Jan 27, 2018 3:26 pm; edited 1 time in total
Posted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 4:12 am

Hello Nancy.

Sorry to hear of your experience. It can be so frustrating when people do not honour their words and it chips away at one's trust in human nature. I don't have many spare supplies since I started irrigating but at that point I had loads of stuff I no longer needed. I posted them off to an organisation in the Phillipines who were posting their needs at that time. I did not request reimbursement of postage, for the same reason as you mention. Whilst I have come to almost expect to be let down by people, I nevertheless, don't like being disappointed in this way so I try to avoid the situation arising in the first place. It might cost me financially, but I feel it is a worthwhile investment to avoid the angst of people letting us down.

Best wishes

Bill 

Posted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 2:02 pm

Bill, when the original request and offer were made, I must be honest and state that my expectations were low, but I WAS hopeful that someone using this site would respect fellow site visitors.  As you mention happens, my own faith in human nature has all but been destroyed by my experience with my hospital stay.  I only wanted to let anyone else who might be considering a situation similar to this one that this is a possible outcome.  And, I must admit that my own human nature probably wanted to publically shame the person just a little bit because he chose to use this site (which does sooooo much good for so many people).  He made his request/plea public using personal tragedy as well as the birth of a child to play on the emotions of people who already have their own hands full with emotional situations.  I hope I can be forgiven for that shortcoming of my own.  And, as I said, should he finally pay the postage, I will be quick to post that as well.

Peace

Nancy

Posted: Mon Jan 29, 2018 2:32 pm

Perhaps using a flat rate postal box and getting paid via paypal before mailing it is the solution.  

I think it is a mistake to assume that because someone has an ostomy they are compassionate and trustworthy.  I have met some amazing people with those qualities on this site.  However, in the end there are all kinds of people who have ostomies.  Getting an ostomy does not alter your core values.  I understand Charles Manson, the personification of evil in my opinion, ultimately died of colon cancer.  

I have given away many supplies over the years.  I have also thrown lots away. I am just glad to get them off the shelf and out of my house.  

Posted: Mon Jan 29, 2018 6:40 pm
There are two charities that accept unused supplies to give out to needy ostomates. That is where you should send your supplies. You would have the good feeling of donating without the feeling that you have been used. These charities are: Osto-Group 4018 Bishop Lane, Louisville, KY 40218 (877)678-6690 and Friends of Ostomates Worlwide 15070 Corporate Rd. North, Jupiter FL 33478 (502) 909-6669.
Posted: Mon Jan 29, 2018 7:37 pm

funnygurl,  good suggestion, but WAY TOO MANY supplies for even the largest flat rate postal box.

 

Posted: Mon Jan 29, 2018 10:15 pm

Nancy

It has only been a month since you and Anthony were in contact regarding the ostomy supplies. Perhaps, what with a new baby and having had a fire to deal with, he has been a bit busy and simply either forgot or has postponed reimbursing you for the postage.

It was certainly lovely of you to send the supplies. Why on earth would you think he would now be selling them?  Who would actually do this?

Hopefully you will hear from him soon and your faith in your fellow man will be restored.

Posted: Tue Jan 30, 2018 9:55 am

Scottie, I was receiving e mails about his intention to pay, even after he received the supplies.  Then he disappeared. Researching further I found that the address he gave was a rental, listed as uninhabited on zillow.  I have attempted to contact the landlord to verify if someone lives there or not, and am awaiting his reply.  UPS researched and advised me the delivery had been made to a man on the porch.  Believe me, I understand about tragedy causing delays in ones life.  But I am an honest person who always trusts that others will also honor their words.  If there were a reason, whatever reason, I would expect at least a response to my emails, but instead there is silence.  fredbilt has messaged me saying he also ran into Anthony.  Fredbilt even went so far as to offer to cover my losses !! which, although I find it EXTREMELY GENEROUS, I do not want him to do so. It is NOT so much an issue of lost funds, it is a matter of abuse and honor.  UPS is concerned that someone uses their services to perpetrate a fraud.  The GUESS that supplies are being resold comes from a lack of a verifiable situation and a presentation of said situation purposefully to prey on the sympathys of another.  I HONESTLY do hope that this GUESS is wrong, but it will take hearing from Anthony to adjust this thought in my mind.  Thank you for your input, and far be it for me to stomp on your faith.  I can tell you that my faith is ALREADY being restored by the responses I have received from other members.  The main purpose for the original post was just by way of warning to others to perhaps be a little less naive than I was.

Peace

Nancy

Posted: Tue Jan 30, 2018 11:15 am

Good Morning Nancy

I did not mean to undermine or criticize your feelings about the situation. What has happened so far IS WRONG. Also, thanks for the warning - which is valuable. As I mentioned, hopefully this person will get his act together and do the honourable thing.

I was interested in your post also because I have recently had a reversal and now have supplies I would like to donate to someone who can use them. Not necessarily someone in need, as I do believe that there are avenues where those folks can get these sort of supplies for free on this continent. Most companies that are producing these items are happy to help out with free samples and more. I will approach an ostomy group.

I am wondering could this be someone who would be considered a Dreamer or Illegal? I also know of and have had experiences with someone who drains the system and still expects more and more because we are a socialist type liberal system here in Canada. When we appear helpful, there are those that will just lay back and let others take over for them completely, Why not? Why work if you don't need to in order to get what you feel you need or want or deserve?

The other thing I was thinking is how cruel it is, if in fact this is a scammer who has realized that there could be a sort of goldmine in reselling these supplies.

A few years ago I ordered a hearing aid for my Mom which was mailed from the USA. When I received it the package was empty. However, it had been signed for (my name)- - someone in my neighbourhood, had either had the pkg delivered to them in error, and had opened it and removed the item had forged my signature to the postal service. Then had helpfully put the item in my own mail box. (detached house - one mailbox - on a very small cul de sac) The item was worth $3,500 and was nowhere to be found.  If only these people who dream up these scams could put that brainpower to a good use - - think of what they could accomplish!!

Posted: Tue Jan 30, 2018 11:43 am

Scottie, 

No offense taken.  Again, I just wanted to point out to fellow members here that apparently there are those out there who will find a way to abuse goodwill and make money from someone elses difficutlies.  I think your analogy of "cruel" is perfect.  There will always be those who feel entitled, for whatever reason, to take advantage of another.  I just wanted to let others here know that I believe that is what happened in this instance.  BTW, I had tried previously to give those extra supplies to a hospital.  They had no interest.  An ostomy support group is probably perfect. 

Was the postal service re: your mom's hearing aid ever able to help?  I know that UPS here appears to be very interested in someone signing for an item shipped to a fraudulent address. It was not the US Postal Service so not a federal offense that way, but still fraud by the perpetrator using a delivery service across state lines making it a felony.

Thanks for your feedback.

Peace

Nancy

Posted: Tue Jan 30, 2018 3:22 pm

Hi Nancy

The company in the US that had sent me the hearing aid (and I had paid for already) was able to send me a refund covered under their company insurance I guess. I had to get another hearing aid.

Did you also have a reversal? Is that why you had the excess supplies?

Scottie

Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2018 3:04 pm

Scottie, 

No reversal, just many trial and error from this unnecessary surgery about which I have MUCH anger.  Long Story and not up to going into it right now, but suffice it to say I WILL NEVER SET FOOT IN A HOSPITAL AGAIN.  I hope your reversal is going well.

Peace

Nancy

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 7:21 pm

Enjoyed reading all comments on donating extra supplies. My Home Care Ostomy Nurse took them off my hands. Their are many People out their whom can't afford items or run out before they can get another Months order. I was lucky to have a great Nurse for a few Months. I cried when she left, awesome help. I still can text or chat, ask questions. Some Ostomy supplies  get old after awhile. Please, please contact a local Home Nurse Assoc. They will pick supplies up. I to, had extra. Thank you... P. S. Glad this site is here. I had Colonoscopy 3 months ago. Great to know we are all here for each other.  Enjoy tips and reading issues. Best to us all!! ❤

Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2018 7:06 pm

Oh my gosh, I am so sorry this happened to you.  It really burns me up when people take advantage of others generosity this way.  I am always leary of people in need.  I worked for over 18 years as a Mental Health Case Manager and saw first hand how so many people take advantage of kind hearted people just to get stuff to sell to others for thier drug and alcohol needs.  I am not saying everyone does this but it changed how I assisted people.  I no longer just give them money.  I ask them what they need if they hit me up on a corner or parking lot and then I take them (not in my car) to a place that has the items and I help them pick them out and pay right there.  I hear so many ask me "just give me the money" but I tell them I don't roll that way.  I also will take anything I want to give away to the homeless shelter or Goodwill or Salvation Army.  I think your idea of donating to an organization is just fine and that is what I would also recommend.  Just take this unfortunate incident as a lesson learned and spread the word to others like you are so they don't get burned.  Good luck to you!

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