Thank you for posting about your feelings on such matters and I am pleased that you have received lots of useful replies to your post.
Being someone who always believed that their lifespan would be much shorter than it has actually been, I have an acute aversion to ‘wasting’ time.
There was a period when I was spending a couple of hours every night sorting out my stoma and, after a while, I was beginning to resent having to do that. Fortunately, I thought about it, and decided that if I multi-tasked during that period, the tending of the stoma and what seemed like a waste of time would not be quite so onerous.
Hence, I began composing rhymes whilst doing this chore, and my attention was diverted away from resentment and on to something which I considered positive and productive.
We all deal with these occasional negative thoughts in different ways, but positive diversions are often an effective strategy for dealing with wayward thoughts and emotions.
I have found one such rhyme which was probably written at the time when I was getting fed up with my resentment towards the stomas chores.
DEALING WITH ’STUFF’.
There are times that all my ‘stuff’
just seems like a load of guff.
Problems that are always there
forcing me to stop and stare.
I focus on the negatives
and veer away from positives.
‘Stuff’ is like a problem-fest
sent to put me to the test.
It comes back time and time again
to twist my mind and tease my brain.
‘Stuff’s ’, like a vortex I have found
it sucks me in and spins me round.
It seems that with this ‘stuff’ of mine
triggers are set at very-fine.
‘Stuff’ winds me up like tightened spring
To be set off by anything.
I know it doesn’t take a lot
for ‘stuff’ to make me lose the plot.
Then I will start to feel some guilt
that in my mind this ‘stuff’ has built.
But now I think I’ve had enough
of all that nasty, toxic ‘stuff’.
I’d like to get my life arranged
so I can get that ‘stuff’ all changed.
I want to get so I can live
with ‘stuff’ that is more positive.
Out with the old, in with the new
I’ll change the things I think and do.
I’ll try to be more introspect
and get myself some self-respect.
If I can only stay this way
more of my ‘stuff’ will be okay.
B. Withers 2012
(In: ‘My Ostomy World’:Book1 2012)