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i am about to have my surgery and have thought a couple of times about just cancelling it have any of you experienced this?

Talk to others with an Ostomy
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MeetAnOstoMate is the largest, independent website for people with an ostomy surgery. A vibrant, multi-topic community where people discuss various things, and give each other love and support.

Good Morning Looking forward! 

I was tempted many times to cancel! I did not want surgery but cancer made it a necessity. I was torn between having it and moving on or taking my chances with recurrence and maybe dying! You are just now having surgery for an ileostomy? Not an additional surgery? I have a Colostomy so it is a little different. I Did not need to gain weight. Still could use to lose a few pounds! I eat anything I want so of course it is not always the best stuff for weight or “Betty” but It is what it is! I am glad I chose surgery! In the beginning it was very hard getting my head around Ostomy life! Finding the appliance that works best for you is the key and once you do that, you go on living life as you always have! You just have to do some additional planning for supplies but otherwise, I cruise, travel, swim, and everything I always did before “Betty” I hope you find the answer for you! It is a life changer and depending on your problems require the surgery, it may be a relief for you! 


thanks   i sure hope i get used to it..i live alone so it is more difficult for me i think


In both of my cases, I had no choice.  It was surgery or be put 6 feet under!  I thank God that He has been with me all these times.  Without Him, I never would have known what to do and might not have gone to the hospital when I did.  I don't know if you have had your surgery or not yet but I hope you will hang out on this website when you are done.  I have learned a great deal through the people here and it is so great having others who have had the same thing done and been through what you are about to or have gone through.  The only thing I have turned down is a reversal of the ileostomy.  When the doctors did the emergency rebuilding of my original ileostomy this last February, I told them I did not want to go through this again.  My doctor told me at that time that I was no longer a candadate for the reversal.  In a way, I was very releived.  The last three years of my life have been a nightmare for me.  I do not want to go through any of it again.  If you wish to be rehooked up and they say you are a good choice for that, research it carefully.  Every surgery I have ever had except for Old and New Maxine and the emergency surgery on my broken foot, I have spent weeks researching.  I recently had my C5 C6 disk in my neck replaced with an artificial one.  I went to my pre-op with 2 pages of questions for the doctor.  I knew everything that they were going to do and could talk intellegently with them.  I always try to research my advasaries!  Don't cancel your surgery.  It is nice not to have to suffer any longer with horrible pain.  We all had to change a few things around when we had our surgeries but in the long run, most of us are glad we did it.  I know I am.  Good luck to you!


looking Forward, 

Being alone certainly makes things a little tougher but you will probably be in the hospital for a while and hopefully have some of your energy back before going home but I would certainly plan formsome home health care for a while. I had a series of operations at the same time including removal of a margin around where my tumor was, vaginal wall reconstruction, removal of a muscle in my chest/ stomach to make a Barbie butt   And the Colostomy. I had no problems except soreness from the cut from my chest to my pubic area! Because of reconstruction, I was sent home with two drainage tubes with bulbs that I had to empty and a Foley catheter that had to be emptied. Had I not had these two things, I could have cared for myself completely but they were tough to manage and wore me out!  I was lucky to have my husband taking care of me! I lost a lot of weight because I was not hungry and the pain meds. Not sure how you would manage but hopefully you do have a support system of friends and family! Maybe they can prepare meals for you. I was up and able to get around in no time and got the Foley out in one week and the drainage tubes in two. I was ready to go then! 

I guess we all make our decisions based on our needs and lifestyle! Hopefully you will have help with your need which ever way you decide! Ostomy life is not all that bad! 



I was offered this surgery several times 2-3 years before I decided to go for it. However, when I was ready, it indicacted that I was really fed up with the life I had and was 'looking forward' to somethiing different and hopefully 'better'.  I have never looked back and I hope you have the same expereience.

Best wishes



you have been an amazing help for me. i have no one here but may have to hire someone for a while  tx


Hi looking forward, 

i would also look into Meals on wheels for temporarily assistance! 

They are in every state and city I believe and such a wonderful service! 

I will keep thinking for alternatives for you! 



 I see you are almost the same age I 'am,  I'am also alone,  But there is help out there,  After your surgery or even before ask for a social/case worker.  they can arrnge for  Visiting Nurses ,  Home Health Care , Therapy and any other services you will need after going home.  Believe me I know first hand  Been there done that  just as you are going thru.  There are many many resourses out there  Just ask.


Looking Forward,

You May want to call your insurance company and see what your benefits are for Home health visit! Most insurance has an allowed amount of visits and you can get those set up before discharge! Save you money I hiring someone on your own.

You will want to set up an account with an Ostomy supply distributor as well! I use Edgepark and found them to be exceptional in placing orders and getting your supplies to you in  a timely manner! When you change your mind a hundred times, they are very nice and helpful. There are others out there as well but be careful, not all of them file your insurance for you! 


I am sure you are on Medicare,  and it covers all your supplies with a Dr's order.    I also use Edgepark,  and the first time my visiting  RN called and placed my order and gave them all my information including my PCP's name and info   They are good to work with.  But your  social worker in the Hospital can set all that up for you befor you go home.    That is part of there service to patients.   Just ask at the Hospital and they will help you..


When I had my surgery  It was an emergency,  I went to CT scan and woke up in intensive care on  vent.  I was in the hospital for 40 days and then went to a rehab /Therpy home  for 8 weeks,   then home so I was never alone.  and then had visiting nurses and Home Health Care  agency help.  They were all great and so helpful.

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