Hello Burru.
Firstly, Let me thank you for sharing your thoughts with us, so that we may comment and perhaps support you during this difficult time.
One of the many things people have difficulty understanding about stomas is that it is not simply about acquiring a stoma; it is about the ‘LOSS’ of a previous lifestyle.
Loss affects people in different ways so, there is no straightforward answer as to how to overcome it or learn to live with it. There is a recognised psychological and emotional  pattern to loss/bereavement/ grieving, and knowing about this can be helpful in dealing with the condition. Sometimes it is helpful to get professional help in the form of counselling, but this is not always necessary (or helpful).  Understanding the condition and the process of recovery  can be obtained via various sources (including the internet), but often the most effective way through this is time and patience.
Now, onto the practicalities of having a new stoma and coping with the ‘inconvenience’ of it all:
They say  that ‘practice makes perfect’, which in some ways sums it all up. However, as you state that you have a colostomy , I would urge you to explore the procedure called ‘IRRIGATION’. Â
This is where we put water into the stoma and it flushes out all the waste material in one go. Thus, we don’t need to wear a bag because there is usually no output from one flush to the next. I irrigate daily, but some people have reported that they don’t need to irrigate that often and two days seems to be common.  Â
With irrigation, all your other practical questions would be a thing of the past and you can get on with a relatively ‘normal’ life much quicker and more effectively  than having to cope with bags and all that they entail.
Irrigation isn’t for everyone, but if you are a suitable candidate, I would advise you to look into it asap.  It surprises me that your stoma nurse did not mention it to you from the outset.
There are several great videos about it on you tube, and plenty of people on here to give you advice if you have any problems.
As others have said, getting used to this new style of life can be frustrating and depressing, but there is nothing like overcoming these sorts of experiences for building one’s confidence and facing  life with a new-found vigour.
I do hope you manage to find ways to appreciate your stoma, rather than resent it. Whenever I have any doubts, I tend to recall what it was like before the stoma. This enables me to realise that I am much better off now than I was before.
Best wishes
Bill