MOST PEOPLE GO THROUGH LIFE dreading that something bad will happen to them. You and I have had our trauma, and that belly attachment that we wear won’t ever allow us to forget it. We deal with it, since we have no choice. We do battle with the shock of it at first, some kind of foreign creature that has fastened upon us like a barnacle on a turtle’s shell. It may have saved our life, but it did so in a rude, abrasive way, leaving us to figure out an unfamiliar new way of life, something so unthinkable, even unimaginable, that it can take a long number of months for recovery to set us on an even keel again. We bring all our available strength to bear on regaining some sense of normality, to rejoining the human race that, at first, we were afraid that we’d left. We develop a technique, two techniques, actually: one, the physical necessity of tending to our new need; the other, the psychological machinations we go through to insure survival with some acceptable level of dignity. Finally, we arrive at that point where we become acceptable to the one observer who most needs that acceptance: ourselves. Then we realize that we’re going to be okay, that the creature has been tamed, put on a leash, domesticated. The trauma has been overcome, mundane needs reassert themselves, routine regains its rightful place. Life goes on.
All very true, Henry, life does go on, but there is not one person on this site who would have a "belly attachment" if they had a choice.🤔
MeetAnOstoMate is a remarkable community of 41,441 members.
“I found real people, real humor, and answers I couldn’t get anywhere else.”
“The support here impressed my husband’s medical team - they plan to recommend it.”
“This community saved me when I thought I was a freak. Now I’m thriving.”
“Thank god for this site - I finally knew what to ask my surgeon.”
In both of my cases, I had no choice. It was surgery or be put 6 feet under! I thank God that He has been with me all these times. Without Him, I never would have known what to do and might not have gone to the hospital when I did. I don't know if you have had your surgery or not yet but I hope you will hang out on this website when you are done. I have learned a great deal through the people here and it is so great having others who have had the same thing done and been through what you are about to or have gone through. The only thing I have turned down is a reversal of the ileostomy. When the doctors did the emergency rebuilding of my original ileostomy this last February, I told them I did not want to go through this again. My doctor told me at that time that I was no longer a candidate for the reversal. In a way, I was very relieved. The last three years of my life have been a nightmare for me. I do not want to go through any of it again. If you wish to be rehooked up and they say you are a good choice for that, research it carefully. Every surgery I have ever had except for Old and New Maxine and the emergency surgery on my broken foot, I have spent weeks researching. I recently had my C5 C6 disk in my neck replaced with an artificial one. I went to my pre-op with 2 pages of questions for the doctor. I knew everything that they were going to do and could talk intelligently with them. I always try to research my adversaries! Don't cancel your surgery. It is nice not to have to suffer any longer with horrible pain. We all had to change a few things around when we had our surgeries but in the long run, most of us are glad we did it. I know I am. Good luck to you!
"Finally, we arrive at that point where we become acceptable to the one observer who most needs that acceptance:
ourselves."
Frankly, I have not come to that point as yet and doubt I have enough years left on this planet to reach that point, but yes, we must 🎶"carry on my wayward son"🎶 - as is typical with me, I end up singing songs in my head and sometimes even out loud when my son-in-law is around as he always says, "STOP SINGING!"... This ALWAYS makes me feel better - not the stop singing comment, but the songs! jb
Learn more about ostomy accessories, and when to use them.