Seeking advice: Mom's lung mets, need help with health issue


Hello everyone,

I trust that you all are doing well and keeping up with your health. Before I seek your good people's advice about my own, I would like you all to please keep my mom in your prayers. She survived breast cancer in 2011 (mastectomy, chemotherapy) and we are shattered at the news about her lung mets. The local doctors have told us that she has got 6-12 months and have recommended palliative care. As I mentioned in my introductory message, Fiji lags behind in medical facilities/infrastructure, so we are planning to take mom to India. I have talked to my oncologists there and they said that surgery is out of the option, but they can help prolong mom's life by a good number of years if the tumors can be contained within the lungs, that is. Right now, I feel so helpless and alone that I had to blog this to get things out of my head. This whole episode since last week (4th Feb) has taken its toll on my own health.

We are a very loving small family, and we are so much attached to each other as we have gone through so much in life, yet we stuck together as one. There's dad, mom, myself, and my younger brother. We both siblings are attached to our parents, especially mom, so much that it is almost impossible to live without seeing her for a day. She had to cut short her recent vacation to New Zealand because she herself could not stay away from us any longer than what she did. So, it is beyond my wildest imagination to lose mom. She is 49, and I feel that God has been unfair to us. I haven't been eating well, and I don't know why, but I have been having heavy discharges from my back. I see blood stains on my underwear, and it gives me a burning sensation. Could this be due to radiation that I received? Or is it due to lots of traveling that I did recently? Or sitting for long in my office? I had this same problem some few months back, and I had written to my surgeons and oncologists, and they prescribed 2 different kinds of tablets, which I did not take because again those were not available in Fiji. I had wanted to get them from India, but the problem subsided naturally. It now worries me!

Did any of you have the same problem? What did you do? Please advise. My surgeons and oncologists are 7 seas across, and it is hard to get in touch with them given India has the 2nd highest population, and the doctor-patient ratio is unimaginable.

Thanking you all in anticipation.

Warm regards,



Jabid, we will keep your mother in our prayers. As for you, if you are bleeding from your bum, I would suggest you seek professional medical help quickly. It's possible that it could be something minor, but you should find out for certain... It could possibly be something more serious.

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Hi Mild, thank you for your advice. I bought some very expensive tablets today recommended by my oncologists, and I have also sent an email to our local surgeons to get an appointment so that I can have a colonoscopy done. The idea of any scope freaks me out as I have had some really bad experiences in the past. Anyone with a permanent colostomy here had a colonoscopy done? I wonder how it is done as almost everything at the back is closed?

Hi Jabid, a late welcome to the site. I have had a colonoscopy and there was plenty of prep liquid to drink like before, and a local anesthesia so you don't feel anything. I have just read your last two blogs and posts. My concern is more for your faith in the Lord. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. I was wondering what the tablets you received from your doctor are for? How is your peristomal skin healing?
Hi Mrs. AI, I was actually prescribed Ofloxacin, Ornidazole, and Lactobacillus. I could not get the exact first two, so the pharmacist gave me metronidazole and ciprofloxacin instead. I have switched to using a different kind of colostomy bag (but of the same brand) with cement powder, and it has helped immensely. By the way, how do we manage our colostomy when given prep liquids? I cannot imagine having a running stomach with a bag on. The nastiest thing one can drink is the prep liquids. It made me vomit a lot, and it is so difficult to take it down the throat. :'( Mrs. A, I see you in the chat room, but I am not able to initiate a chat even though I am on full membership. I would have loved to chat with you, especially in regards to the colonoscope. Highest Regards, Jabid
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Hi Jabid, I am not a full member and not in the chat because I'm in Bible study. To go to General Chat, everyone can click on the words "General Chat" in the center top section of the main page. If you tried to hit the chat word near my name, it would not work because that is a private chat (one on one) only available to paying members. I know how you feel about the prep, I have refused my last colonoscopy due to the grief it gives me. Now I hear there is a pill I can take, so I will be going for an overdue appointment this coming Spring. You will take the prep at home and stay very close to the bathroom as it will cause a lot of emptying needed with the bag. I hope someone who has had this experience more recently than I will also respond to your inquiry.
Hi Jabid,

Only good thoughts and prayers for your mom's improved health. Bleeding from your rectal area could be from discharge, irritation, and pressure. Sitting for long periods with pressure there can create some problems. There is also limited air getting there. Limited airflow, sweating, pressure could lead to irritation, discharge, infection, skin breakdown, etc. A gauze pad, some antibiotic cream, or preferably powder can absorb any discharge or moisture. Change as needed before it gets too moist. Sitting on a pillow can help. Sleeping on your side would also reduce pressure. I have dealt with similar complaints for a long time. Once again, only positive thoughts.


Hi again, forgot to comment on colonoscopy. For my ileostomy, there is no prep except to not eat after midnight and it is done through the stoma. Others I know with colostomy are on a liquid diet for 24 hours prior to the procedure and done through the stoma. Barry

Hi Barry, thank you so much for your well wishes and your reply. I now can breathe easily. I have to be really honest. I had my surgery on the 3rd of July 2012, and I had continuous checkups until I got discharged from the hospital on the 27th of November 2012. I got back to Fiji on the 29th of November, and since then I have never consulted any doctors locally. I very strongly believe that the local doctors screwed up my life. During the course of 2008-2009, I had four polypectomies done, and the local surgeons kept on telling me nothing to worry about. When I reached India, the doctors there told me that had I gone to them 6 months earlier, I could have avoided a permanent colostomy. Anyway, that is my darkest past, and I am trying to move ahead with life. The point is, I am just so scared of the local surgeons here that I really do not want them to tamper with my ostomy. But again, do I have a choice? NO! Thank you so much once again, Barry. Warmest regards, Jabid.
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