This topic is about navigating the emotional challenges and the search for companionship after undergoing ostomy surgery, especially when dealing with grief and loneliness. The originator of the discussion has faced significant life changes, including the loss of her husband, battling cancer, and adjusting to life with an ostomy. She feels isolated and is seeking advice on how to find a partner and cope with these feelings.

Here are some helpful suggestions and insights shared by others:

1. Connect with others on this site for daily support. Many members understand the specific concerns related to living with an ostomy and are available for chats or private messages.

2. Use the "Relationship Search" feature on this website to find potential matches who might share similar experiences or understand your situation.

3. Join local ostomy support groups through websites like uoa.org or uoaa.org. Many people have found lifelong friends and in-person support through these groups.

4. Consider seeking additional bereavement resources, such as support groups for widows or widowers, to help share your loss and rebuild social connections.

5. Find comfort in spiritual or faith-based practices. Prayer and the belief that a higher power is always present can provide strength and solace.

6. Remember to reinforce your self-image. You are still the same beautiful and attractive person; an ostomy is just a change in how your body functions.

7. Engage in hobbies or clubs in your area to meet people naturally. Shared interests often lead to invitations to events and new friendships.

8. Long-distance relationships can be successful. Some people are open to relocating once a strong connection is established.

9. Mainstream dating sites like Match.com and Plenty of Fish can still be effective. Many people have their own challenges, visible or not. Be cautious of scammers, but remember that your ostomy is private until you choose to share it.

10. If you prefer a partner who also has an ostomy, be patient. The local community may be small, but new members join over time.

11. Embrace humor and positivity. Celebrate your resilience by playing a fun song like James Brown’s “Papa’s Got a Brand New Bag” after each bag change, and enjoy a good laugh.