IT OCCURRED TO ME THIS MORNING that I am living my life in three different dimensions. There is REALITY, of course, where I am continually engaged in such simplicities as taking care of daily necessities like meals, my ostomy, relationships. Then there is my IMAGINATION where I flit off, away from the diurnal grind, to play around with whatever fancy or fantasy occurs to me. I am free to keep it or discard it, write it down or forget about it. Finally, there are BOOKS, the handy, easy to handle written records of other people’s realities or imaginations. Fiction or non-fiction, whatever genre the book happens to be in, it is this third dimension that ultimately improves my ability to function in the other two dimensions. Other people, smarter than me, have recorded their observations and conclusions in their own unique way, and I happily learn from them. Whether the writer’s chronicle exhibits as a novel or a memoir, a poem or a parody, it is exposing me to something that I otherwise would not have experienced and from which I would not have benefited. Like most people, for instance, I have strong feelings about war, something that – due to my ostomy and 4-F classification – I have not experienced personally. But I know about W.W. I from Erich Maria Remarque and Robert Graves; I know about W.W. II from Winston Churchill and Norman Mailer and Joseph Heller; I know about Vietnam from Neil Sheehan and Max Hastings. Fortunately for me, my PTSD was only from ileostomy surgery, not the jungles of Vietnam, and the second and third dimensions helped me get over it successfully.
"[Books] are the most vital, intimate, personal, mind-altering, thought-twisting, friend-giving, empathy-strengthening, thrill-riding, emotional, world-shaking technology we will ever have"
— Matt Haig
MeetAnOstoMate is a remarkable community of 41,451 members.
“I mostly read and still feel like I belong.”
“Doctors took notes; they want others to find this website.”
“From midnight blowouts to big wins, there’s always a hand to hold.”
MeetAnOstoMate website turned out to be a lifesaver for me. I say this because, for me, this ostomy journey was a devastating event both physically and mentally.
Here, I found folks who understood my feelings even better than my family or friends could. Only a fellow ostomate can understand how you really feel.
Information sharing is key, as well as support and understanding, to ultimately bring more harmony into our ostomy life journey. I found here, virtually no ostomy questions that are not touched upon. Questions which some might feel, may be too trivial to contact a doctor about or even too shy or embarrassed to ask their own doctor about. They are all addressed here.
For me, anonymity was very helpful in seeking answers to each phase of this life changing medical and mental event. Sharing initial trauma feelings, ongoing support and finally acceptance was what I found with my membership here. I am not sure what my mental and physical attitude would be today without having found this site.
Additional benefits included: finding products and ideas to help with daily maintenance, innovative ideas and as a bonus - some great humor.
After all “laughter IS the best medicine”.
I have been a member for 3 years, an ostomate for 4 years - yes, I certainly wish I would have found it immediately after surgery but so very thankful I finally found it when I did as I truly believe it turned my troubled depression and situation into a more positive attitude and acceptance.
Sincerely,
An Ileostomate nicknamed Justbreathe 🫶🏼