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40,881 members
Jun 22, 2023

Struggling with Post-Surgery Adjustments and Upcoming Family Reunion

Topic Explanation:

The forum discussion revolves around an individual who is struggling with post-surgery adjustments, particularly dealing with two stomas and a large hernia, while also preparing for an upcoming family reunion. The person expresses feelings of self-consciousness and anxiety about their appearance and potential odor issues, compounded by the fact that surgery is not an option due to severe COPD. They seek encouragement and advice on how to cope with these challenges and the emotional impact of attending the reunion.

Advice and Insights:

1. Emotional Support and Encouragement:
- Remember that you are strong and have overcome a lot. Embrace your journey and wear your ostomy with pride.
- Focus on the fact that everyone has their own issues, and your family is there to see you, not judge you.
- Allow yourself to feel and express your emotions, but also try to focus on the positive aspects of reconnecting with family.

2. Practical Tips for the Reunion:
- Consider wearing flowy dresses or clothing with an empire waist to help conceal the hernia and ostomies.
- Use deodorant in your ostomy bag for peace of mind regarding odor.
- Stay busy and active to keep your mind off worries and enjoy the moment.

3. Hernia Management:
- Explore options for custom hernia belts that can accommodate two stomas. Companies like StealthBelt and NU-Hope offer custom solutions.
- Consider consulting with a seamstress to modify existing belts or create a custom solution.

4. Coping Mechanisms:
- Use humor and music to lift your spirits and distract from negative thoughts.
- Focus on the joy of seeing family and sharing stories, rather than on your appearance.

5. Personal Experiences and Reassurance:
- Others have experienced similar situations and found that people focus more on your energy and presence than on physical differences.
- The anticipation of an event is often worse than the event itself, and many find relief and joy once they engage with loved ones.
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