This topic is about someone who has been living with an ileostomy for 13 years and is struggling with social anxiety and a fear of leaks in public. They feel isolated and are seeking advice on how to overcome these fears and regain a normal social life. Here are some helpful strategies and insights shared by others who have faced similar challenges:

1. Leak-prevention routines:
- Always have a full emergency kit with you, including a spare pouch, wafer, barrier ring, wipes, and odor eliminator.
- Learn to recognize the early signs of a leak, such as a cool or wet sensation, skin irritation, or a sudden odor, and change your pouch immediately to prevent a bigger issue.
- Consider the worst-case scenario and have a plan ready to handle it.

2. Gradual exposure to rebuild confidence:
- Begin with short walks, then progress to brief coffee meet-ups, and eventually half-day outings to local attractions.
- Celebrate each small success to boost your confidence and reinforce your progress.

3. Professional and peer support:
- Think about seeing a therapist, psychiatrist, or counselor. Medications like antidepressants or anti-anxiety drugs might be helpful.
- Join a local in-person ostomy support group to connect with others who understand your experiences and can help normalize accidents.

4. Modern products and samples to improve security:
- Reach out to companies like Coloplast, ConvaTec, and Hollister for free samples and fitting advice. Try different products such as flat and convex wafers, barrier rings, adhesive removal wipes, barrier prep wipes, odor-eliminator packets, barrier extenders, and the Hollister ostomy belt.
- Experiment with mixing and matching products from different brands to find what works best for you.

5. Mind-set and self-image:
- Challenge negative self-talk with positive affirmations and practice self-compassion.
- Remember that partners fall in love with the whole person, not just a body part or appliance. Be open to showing up both physically and emotionally.

6. Motivation mantras:
- Encourage yourself with phrases like “Put one foot in front of the other” to gently push beyond your comfort zone each day.
- Recognize that reaching out for help is already a positive step towards meaningful change.