This topic is about dealing with feelings of depression and the persistent "why" questions that can arise after undergoing emergency ostomy surgeries. The person sharing their experience is having a tough day, feeling sad and preoccupied with thoughts about their past surgeries, which led to the loss of their lower bowel. They find themselves repeatedly asking why this happened, which is making their depression worse. Although they have managed these feelings in the past, they have recently become more intense. They are grateful for an upcoming appointment with a therapist who understands and helps them work through these emotions.

Here are some pieces of advice and insights shared by others:

1. Many people emphasize the importance of professional counseling and are pleased that the person has a therapist. One suggestion is to find an in-person ostomy support group through wound or ostomy nurses for additional peer support and practical advice.

2. Try replacing "why" questions with "what" questions, such as "What can I do next?" This can help avoid unanswerable and guilt-provoking thoughts, allowing for more constructive coping.

3. Understand that asking "why" is a normal part of processing grief and trauma after such significant surgeries. It's important to allow yourself to feel these emotions while also moving forward.

4. Be gentle with yourself and recognize that grieving is a process. Remember, you are not alone—many people with ostomies experience similar feelings and find strength in connecting with others in the community.