After my surgery (2015) while trolling on the computer, I lucked up on this site and started reading, dag there were many like myself. My thoughts were I found a home, initially I didn't post I kept reading.
It was comforting to know I wasn't alone in this journey, The things that were happening to my body were happening to others.
I was learning there were different surgeries and reasons that led to wearing appliances. Those that weren't born with a stoma call it the new normal.
For many they were born with a birth defect and knew no other way(note) I didn't create the word new normal. In all honesty I don't know where it actually came from.
Many were married and some were single. Many are not even ostomates but are members for reasons of their own. Perhaps their significant other had or have a stoma.
Many posted about how their significant other left after their surgery .The botton life is some people can't handle sickness,. Would it be fair to say they couldn't stand the sight.!
There many that have been with their significant others for years and are still together. There some that cry out in their very own way, alone and searching for support or even friendship..
In collections I read about a gentleman who himself was an ostomate, but he didn't want an ostomate as a partner.
Now this of course is his choice, as we all differ in opinions.
There are many who are alone, because of death of their significant others. I know being human we all need to feel loved and accepted. Heck even a dog want to be loved! Right?
Let's fast forward, I ask myself sometimes would I be with another like myself because of what I know. I do know people judge others based on a disabilty. If you want to call it that!
I have more empathy now, than I had prior to my surgery. If only we as people were flies on the wall, would we then be more sensitive to others?
Many people, once they close their doors are truly lonely, feeling unloved. Yet many wouldn't know it because of the brave front we as people put on. (shield)
Strange how we want love and respect, yet lack the ability to give it. My thoughts!