Good Evening, KROS~ (It's after 7:30 p.m. in England)
As resilient as the body, mind and spirit can be, it will still take time to fully recover from trauma. Actually, some people may never "fully recover", but may make positive progress with time.
If you delve into some of the posts on this site, you will see many of us are concerned with our new/changed/adjusted physical function(s), how we'll cope with a new lifestyle, if our relationships with others will change, what we can/cannot do, accomplish or enjoy, whether or not we can earn a living in the same vocation post-surgically, how we can camouflage our necessary external "gear"... Basically, how our lives will change. There are so many considerations.
I think this applies to almost all ostomates, whether temporary or permanent.
Change can be hard. Traumatic change, more so! Actually, "hard" is probably understating it. I don't believe you'd find a single ostomate who would say about their transition from pre-to current- or post-ostomate lives, "Hey! It was a breeze! My life hasn't changed a bit, and I'd recommend that EVERYONE have an ostomy!" (Okay, now maybe if someone were high or drunk they might... LOL)
Everyone, ostomate or not, we all have our histories, and our stories, our memories of what was, and our hopes for what will be. In the middle of all that - happening in between all of that - is Life. And, when Change comes about, many of us do what we can to bend in our lives, so we don't break. We make adjustments, we lean on others who have been through the same or similar situation... We reach out.
KROS, you may, indeed, have PTSD. I can't imagine what you have been through over the last 6 weeks, but I have experienced my own trauma and grief. How you deal with your experience may affect how you live the rest of your life.
Please consider professional therapy through a counselor, psychologist or psychiatrist. If you are experiencing PTSD, or another physio-emotional response, a professional is equipped with tools to help you deal positively with your trauma, and to move forward in as healthy a way as possible.
Also, please remember to be gracious with yourself during this healing process - on all levels. It may be the greatest gift that you give to yourself.
Let us know how you are, as often as you are able. : )