Logo for MeetAnOstoMate
Support | Friendship | Relationships
27,789 members
Next >

Scared to death about so called barbie butt surgery

Mon Aug 01, 2022 3:19 pm
"MeetAnOstoMate is the best website for people with an Ostomy. So much understanding. Everyone should join."

Hope someone can reassure me that this stump removal and barbie butt surgery is not going to be a living hell. I am having it done on 9/1/2022 and I am starting to get real anxiety about it.  Of course all your family and friends tell you that you will be fine (they have no clue) the first surgery sucked but hoping this one is not worse. 

Mon Aug 01, 2022 3:42 pm

The surgery isn’t all that bad, recovery time will vary for each person. You won’t be sitting too much for awhile, so get used to laying or standing. 

MeetAnOstoMate - 27,789 members
Mon Aug 01, 2022 3:42 pm

I completely understand, I’m waiting on the date for my own Barbie butt and the anxiety(and pain) are through the roof, I’ve read lots of stories from folks here about their experiences and it helps tons. I’m sure others that are more helpful will chime in. 

Mon Aug 01, 2022 5:32 pm


AlexT wrote:

The surgery isn’t all that bad, recovery time will vary for each person. You won’t be sitting too much for awhile, so get used to laying or standing. 

Laying I can do but standing is hard because of bad knees (next surgerys) thanks

Tue Aug 02, 2022 3:16 am

There are special pillows that you can sit on that have an open center.  Some are inflatable.  And who came up with the name "Barbie butt"??

Tue Aug 02, 2022 3:33 am


nobecindy7 wrote:

Laying I can do but standing is hard because of bad knees (next surgerys) thanks

I got my Barbie Butt a year ago, and I had no problem sitting and it all went great. Don't worry until you have to and you probably won't have too

Tue Aug 02, 2022 3:59 am


HenryM wrote:

There are special pillows that you can sit on that have an open center.  Some are inflatable.  And who came up with the name "Barbie butt"??

You don’t want the pillows with open centers, puts more stress on your wound. My surgeon didn’t even want me sitting on the toilet to empty, so I emptied my not a “bowl” and then emptied that into the toilet. Don’t know who came up with the name but it’s very fitting. 🤷‍♂️😁



Last edited by AlexT on Tue Aug 02, 2022 4:02 am; edited 1 time in total
Tue Aug 02, 2022 4:00 am


IGGIE wrote:

I got my Barbie Butt a year ago, and I had no problem sitting and it all went great. Don't worry until you have to and you probably won't have too

You would be the only person I’ve ever heard say they had no issues sitting right after the surgery, but good for you. 

Tue Aug 02, 2022 8:00 am

Hi Nobecindy its surgery its going to hurt but if you take the pain meds before it gets too bad it should be manageble, once its healed you,ll be glad its done and you dont have to deal with the mucous the anus produces even after its been disconnected, get a real comfy pillow to sit on for the first couple of weeks and dont lift anything over five pounds not even a baby.  good luck

Tue Aug 02, 2022 11:50 am

Everyone's experience is different. I had my APR over two years ago... it is painful I'm not going to lie but it is manageable if you stay on top of it.  Mine had the bonus surprise of also giving me a urostomy (twofer) which added to the pain.  All in all, you'll make it through and see that it gets better with time. After awhile you don't really even think about it. Good luck and best wishes on your surgery!

Tue Aug 02, 2022 12:46 pm


AlexT wrote:

You don’t want the pillows with open centers, puts more stress on your wound. My surgeon didn’t even want me sitting on the toilet to empty, so I emptied my not a “bowl” and then emptied th...

I was wondering how I was gonna empty my bag...

Tue Aug 02, 2022 12:56 pm


nobecindy7 wrote:

I was wondering how I was gonna empty my bag...

This is what they used in the hospital to measure my output, and it’s what I used at home too. I still use it for adding water to my bag to rinse it out if need be. 

Tue Aug 02, 2022 6:33 pm

Yeah, not much fun and still quite painful after 6 months, but a better life than the fistulas and abscesses that came before.

Emptying---I keep a shower chair in the bathroom. No longer needed for showers but I can pull it close enough to the toilet to 

suspend the bag over the water. Best way I've found, splashage notwithstanding.

Fri Aug 05, 2022 5:28 pm

I just had my BB surgery this past April. I was hoping for it to be laparoscopic but too many adhesions so I had open surgery. It was painful post surgery but not overwhelmingly so. Take the pain meds, and you should be ok.  I did the same as Alex at first and emptied into a jug and then into the toilet. It wasn't long before I could sit on the toilet to empty. The incision in my butt took the longest to heal and it's still a bit uncomfortable sitting on hard surfaces but most of the time it's pretty good. Try not to worry too much about it. Once it's over and the healing starts you will feel much better. Good luck with everything!🍀

Sun Aug 07, 2022 3:00 pm


nobecindy7 wrote:

I was wondering how I was gonna empty my bag...

Another option would be to face the toilet and go down to one knee on the floor to empty. I have never been able to empty while sitting on the toilet seat. Much easier for me to do the knee.

Sun Aug 07, 2022 3:52 pm


GraphX12 wrote:

Another option would be to face the toilet and go down to one knee on the floor to empty. I have never been able to empty while sitting on the toilet seat. Much easier for me to do the knee.

That’s exactly what I do now. 👍 flush the toilet and as the water starts to go down, empty the bag. No need to put toilet paper on the water to prevent splash back and it gets 99% of the smell gone right away. 

Sun Aug 07, 2022 5:31 pm

I had 4 years of living with a diseased rectal stump, after having the initial ileostomy when I was 15..   Drs. tried to heal ( Ulcerative colitis)  using oral, topical, medications plus enemas..    I wa s 19, and literally sick of it, and begged for t he surgery..   Living with  the UC was still painful and intrusive..  The surgery wasn't easy, but I was prepared for it.....and while it took some time to heal.... It finally did..   I've had m y ostomy for over 60 years......  and my quality of life improved  greatly...   I've never re gretted t he decision...    Just take  it as it comes, and don't spend the time on anxiety now...   Ask questions......and process the answers, and then deal w ith  the events as they happen.   Best of luck   Marsh

Mon Aug 08, 2022 6:53 am


GraphX12 wrote:

Another option would be to face the toilet and go down to one knee on the floor to empty. I have never been able to empty while sitting on the toilet seat. Much easier for me to do the knee.

Glad to know I’m not that only one that does this, I’m in good company and it’s exactly how I empty

Mon Aug 08, 2022 10:40 am

I have a Ken butt (August 2019). Expect 10 weeks minimum convalescence in bed laying on either side.  After that you will learn quickly to sit on one side or the other since sitting straight will put too much pressure on the incision site. Avoid toilets seats completely since they tend to pull the buttocks apart (painful)!  Since you are a woman, you may want to consider a female urinal device to make it less painful to use the restroom while you heal.  Once all the edema and healing is complete, you will feel pretty much normal.  You may notice some numbness in the dermas when you bath around the incision, but most of that feeling should return over time.  Don't worry; you can do this.  Good luck and God bless.

Mon Aug 08, 2022 6:07 pm

I had my “Barbie butt” four years ago. I remember being very nervous and frightened about it. It just felt “wrong” to have my rectum removed and my anus sewn shut. (Even though I knew, intellectually, that they were now extra parts) But honestly, it wasn’t that bad all-in-all. No complications or anything for me. You have to wear a maxi pad in your underwear for a while until it complexly heals. It was more the mental aspect of it for me. Four years later I feel great about the decision because I don’t have those parts that could cause problems down the line (cancer, etc) Truly, you will be fine.

Tue Aug 09, 2022 7:38 pm

I had surgery in February. I had way more than that done, but I didn’t find it worse than any of the other issues I had after surgery. One thing I did at home once I was able to sit some was to make it more comfortable was I mad a “nest” with a soft comforter. It added softness without any pulling. I used it for weeks. 

Wed Aug 10, 2022 7:49 am

Hi there. Nobody and I mean nobody could have been more nervous than me. The morning of the surgery I just said screw it. I was tired of crapping thirty times a day etc. The surgery was fine. The nurses walked me by the hand to the OR. What a baby I was. I just laid down and said to the surgeon - please make me better. She did. Three months later I feel alive and well and can look back at it as something that needed to be done so I could live. Take some deep breaths and look around you. Life is beautiful and we should be able to enjoy it. This surgery is just something that will allow that. The worst part was the hospital food. Bring an iPad or laptop to the hospital while in recovery so you can watch youtube. Time will just fly by!!!

Thu Aug 11, 2022 1:50 pm

I had both done at the same time as well as a resection of my vaginal wall. So I was cut open from my navel to the base of my lumbar spine with wound vacs front and back. It was a lot all at once.  

I understand your concern. But remember that you will have less disturbance of your internal organs this time so it shouldn’t be as hard.  It will be worth it. 


Fri Aug 19, 2022 3:13 am

I had the surgery 2 weeks ago. It's not that bad. Was off strong pain meds in 3 days. Now just on panadol (tylenol). I went to Ikea and got a super cushioned lounge chair and a round cushion for regular seats. The first few days out of hospital car rides and sitting was painful but the lounge chair is completely comfortable and short car rides are no problem now. I only sit on hard surfaces for a short period but otherwise it's not a problem most of the time. It gets most sore at night so that's the only time I need panadol now. Good luck. Wishing you a speedy recovery. 

Fri Aug 19, 2022 7:41 am

Regarding Barbie butt LOL! That is a new expression for me. I had permanent colostomy surgery in August 2021. I had my rectum and anus removed. I have found that it is so much easier than what I was going through before my surgery. I never ever have to wipe my butt again :-). So yes it is a different way of life now but wearing the pouch, Is so much better than the life I had before my surgery. I think you’ll get used to it and enjoy a different life now.


Mon Aug 29, 2022 1:55 am


AlexT wrote:

You don’t want the pillows with open centers, puts more stress on your wound. My surgeon didn’t even want me sitting on the toilet to empty, so I emptied my not a “bowl” and then emptied th...

This is really helpful advice that I have been following since I read it. Definitely makes a difference to healing.

* Please, do not post contact information, personal information or advertising.
All times are GMT - 5 Hours