My ostomy gear


Since I had an ostomy

so many things have come to me.

Sometimes I think I’ll disappear

under all this osto-gear.

In days gone by I wondered why

old men wore their trousers high.

I could not imagine how it felt

wearing braces with no belt.

But now I have an ostomy

I understand this strategy.

The belt-line must be elevated

so stomas don’t get perforated.

This storyline does not end here

I wish to tell of all my gear.

All those things I use and wear

here are some that I will share.

Even I can be bemused

at the old belts that I have used.

Their height is just below my boobs

to seal the tops of drainage tubes.

Some other gear I can disclose:

elastic belts and pantyhose.

If hernias threaten I suppose

these must be worn beneath my clothes.

I don a cricket box of course

preventing scratching from pets claws.

Wet wipes, dry wipes, hair dryer,

none of these I had prior.

Big bags small bags, open and closed,

stick-ons, clip-ons and those to dispose.

Lotions, potions, barrier sprays,

enough to last for quite a few days.

Scissors straight and some with curve

so small round shapes we can preserve.

Adhesive removers, sprays and wipes,

everything comes in several types.

When I mess or make a smell

my ostomy won’t go down well.

With all this stuff around the house

I feel for my long-suffering spouse.

Rectal catheters, inco-pads,

all the very latest fads.

Odour neutralizers do their best,

household deodorizers fail the test.

And to house this equipment boom

I had to build a new bathroom.

A bit of planning often pays

for now we groom in separate bays.

Were I to venture from my door

I’d need these things and so much more.

Travel can be sometimes hard

that’s why I have a travel card.

Although this list may seem quite long

most of my stuff will quell the pong.

And getting rid of personal waste

will not be to most folk’s taste.

Forgive me if my mind will scoff

if just the thought can put you off.

Think of those less fortunate us

who daily cope without much fuss.

Count your blessings one by one

for ostomies are not much fun.

And I would give you all my gear

for your working guts my dear.

Bill Withers 2011


Nice job, Bill.

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Hello Mrs A. Thank you for your comment. It feels good to get some feedback, especially when it indicates that someone has appreciated what they have read. Best wishes Bill
Past Member

Genius! Bill, I love it!

July 18, 2013 Hello LostRealist. I think that 'genius' is OTT but I do appreciate the fact that you liked the verse. When there is an urge to express oneself about such mundane issues we cannot expect others to be interested. However, there are people who will read rhyming verse and take in the gist of the storyline whereas they would not otherwise be interested in this sort of subject matter. Hopefully it might give a few ordinary people a lighthearted look into our world. Best wishes Bill
Getting Support in the Ostomy Community with LeeAnne Hayden | Hollister
Past Member

That's really good.


Excellent job! I always enjoy your poems. Hometown.

Hello gsamp51 hometown.Thanks for your comments. I always look forward to seeing who has actually appreciated a verse enough to post a comment. It is also interesting to note how many comments there are in relation to how many people have viewed each verse. There appear to many people who are non-participant spectators but it is very supportive to those (such as myself)to recieve some sort of definite (and hopefully positive) feedback on the stuff shared in blogs.I suppose it's a bit like an 'entertainer' who puts their material out to an audience and just hopes for a response. Those responses are partly a motivation to create more. Best wishes Bill
Past Member

I write poetry, so I really enjoyed reading it. I also rhyme my poems like this one. Very well done.

Hello gsamp51, Thanks for your comment. I have experimented on occasions with non-rhyming poetry but It never quite had the rhythm as the rhyming ones so I tend to stick with this now. I've written so many on ostomy related stuff that I'm beginning to wonder if there is much more left to versify. However, I do have one or two more that I will post as and when the present one disappears from the screen. It somehow doesn't seem appropriate to post them in quick succession as I believe that this type of rhyme needs to be read with some time separation between poems.How about posting some of your work - I'd love to read some of it. Best wishes Bill
Past Member

Well, my stuff is not ostomy related. If you want to read a few, I have some posted on The pictures, along with the poems, I took those photos. I like photography as well... except the poem "Life is Never Easy," that photo I never took. Just put "Gail Sampson" in the search engine on there, they will come up.

Past Member

I look forward to seeing some more of your poems.

I have looked on the cosmofunnel site for your work but there does not appear to be an internal search engine (maybe it requires the reader to sign up for this) Nonetheless I looked at many poems and artwork on the site and found myself being pleasantly distracted. Best wishes Bill
Past Member

Here, this should get you to mine.. It's a good site for poets, etc.. Good site.

Past Member

Oh dear, the word "its" is attached to the end of Sampson. Here it is again:

Helo Gail, Thanks for the address/link - unfortunately the cosmofunnel site still wouldn't let me in to see your poems without signing up --so I did that and perused your work. I was very impressed and liked both your pictures and your poems.way back in 2002 I collaborated on a book with an artist who painted 'social issues'. She did the oil paintings and I wrote the verses to capture the sentiments. The combination of pictures and poetry is a very pleasing complimentary way of expressing an idea and I feel you have achieved this very well in your work. Keep it up! Best wishes Bill
Past Member

Thank you, Bill. Both are my passions. Thanks for taking the time to view them.

Hello Gail, No need to thank me for reading your poems and pictures - the pleasure was all mine.Best wishes Bill

Lovely poem.

Hello mara727. Thank you so much for your feedback as it means a lot. I'm pleased you liked it. Best wishes Bill
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