This topic explores the reasons why ostomates and others might turn to online communities for support and connection. It highlights the contrast between the confident image people often present in public and the loneliness they might feel in private. The anonymity of the internet can encourage people to express themselves more freely, leading to the question of who they truly are behind the screen. Here are some key points discussed:

- Many people experience loneliness after surgery or the loss of a relationship, which can lead them to seek companionship online.
- Accepting changes in one's body and dealing with intimacy issues post-surgery can be challenging.
- While online interactions can provide a sense of connection, they also come with the risk of living through others' experiences rather than one's own.
- People in online communities come from various backgrounds, including lifelong ostomates, those awaiting or having undergone reversal, and even individuals without ostomies who seek a sense of belonging.
- The writer questions whether people can move past self-pity and form genuine connections through online interactions.

Here are some pieces of advice and insights shared:

1. Time spent on the computer can be meaningful and productive. Many use it for writing, learning, and engaging in thoughtful discussions rather than just for entertainment.
2. Not everyone experiences loneliness in the same way. Some people enjoy their solitude but still appreciate occasional online interactions.
3. Being authentic is more important than worrying about potential falsehoods. Honest posts can benefit both those who write them and those who read them silently.
4. Sharing success stories, like someone who had a successful reversal after six months with an ileostomy, can provide hope and balance out more difficult experiences. Even after a successful reversal, there are ongoing challenges:
- Adjustments, such as dietary care, are necessary when living without a colon.
- Social anxieties, like using public restrooms, may persist but can be managed.
- Having supportive partners can make a significant positive impact.