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41,422 members
Sep 26, 2009

Coping with Stoma and Post-Surgery Challenges

This topic is about someone who experienced a significant life change after undergoing an abdomino-perineal resection, which resulted in the creation of a stoma. The suddenness of the surgery and the lack of post-operative support left them feeling shocked and betrayed. For three years, they have been managing their stoma care on their own, dealing with ongoing challenges like constant diarrhea and a prolapsed bladder. They are reaching out for advice and support from others who have faced similar situations.

Here are some helpful insights and advice shared by others:

1. Take things one day or even one minute at a time. Focusing on small, immediate goals can be more manageable than worrying about the entire future.

2. Try to shift your mindset towards gratitude. Make a list of things you can still do, like seeing, hearing, walking, and loving, rather than dwelling on what you can't do.

3. Avoid seeing yourself as a victim. Building resilience and self-respect can attract more genuine support than self-pity.

4. Engage your mind and lift your spirits with activities like humor, poetry, music, puzzles, crosswords, Sudoku, and jigsaws.

5. Connect with others through ostomy forums and local support groups. Many have found meaningful help and companionship online.

6. If faith or spirituality is important to you, consider drawing on those resources, such as prayer or listening to uplifting music.

7. Accept that bad days will happen. Allow yourself to feel down but try to bounce back quickly.

8. For practical issues like high-output ileostomies or frequent leaks:
- Seek temporary help from stoma-care nurses if you need to change your appliance more than 5–7 times a day.
- Keep your supplies within easy reach and prepare the new pouch before removing the old one to reduce mess and fatigue.
- Consider using protective underwear if continence is a concern.

9. During times of weakness or medication side effects, accept help and remember that these situations usually stabilize over time.

10. Remember that many people might trade their situations for yours. Comparing downward can help reinforce appreciation for your life.
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