This topic is about someone who initially had their large intestine removed and received a temporary ileostomy. After a reversal surgery, they faced severe complications and are now planning to have a permanent ileostomy to regain their quality of life. Here are some insights and advice shared by others who have been through similar experiences:

1. After the reversal, they experienced constant diarrhea, which kept them mostly at home. Before the colectomy, they dealt with extreme constipation, needing multiple laxatives every other day.

2. They feel the reversal surgery was a mistake due to inadequate pre-operative information and have undergone four abdominal surgeries within a year. Their surgeon has apologized and agreed to perform the surgery for a permanent ileostomy.

3. They are seeking reassurance that life with a permanent stoma can be normal and fulfilling.

4. Many long-term ostomates, ranging from 7 to 29 years, have shared that having a permanent ileostomy or colostomy significantly improved their health and quality of life. They do not feel it limits them.

5. A permanent diversion should not be seen as a medical failure. For many, it represents the start of a more stable and predictable lifestyle, free from constant bowel issues, medications, and frequent doctor visits.

6. Choosing not to reverse or opting for a permanent solution after complications is common, especially when factors like pre-existing sphincter damage, severe disease activity, or very high stool frequency make continence unlikely.

7. Emotional adjustment is easier with support from partners and the ostomy community. Learning self-care skills, such as changing baseplates and managing pouches independently, can build confidence.

8. Honest and experience-based discussions, even if blunt, can help validate fears and set realistic expectations for those considering a permanent solution.