Living with a long-term ileostomy can be a challenging journey, especially when it comes to accepting this new way of life. If you're finding it hard to come to terms with your ileostomy, you're not alone. Many people have shared their experiences and advice on how to gradually reach acceptance and find peace with it.

- Acceptance often takes time. Many people find the first year or two to be the toughest, but eventually, the ileostomy becomes part of the "new normal."

- Allow yourself to grieve. It's natural to feel anger, sadness, and wonder "Why me?" These feelings are part of the process and tend to lessen over time.

- Try shifting your focus:
1. Dive into hobbies that capture your interest, like writing, gaming, volunteering, or traveling.
2. Slowly return to activities you enjoyed before. Each small success can boost your confidence.

- Reframe your perspective. Instead of seeing the ostomy as a burden, view it as a life-saving solution that ends pain. Practicing daily gratitude or finding humor in the situation can help.

- Compare your current life with how it was before, dealing with conditions like ulcerative colitis or IBD. You might find relief in having less pain and fewer urgent bathroom trips.

- Keep things in perspective. Many people live with greater limitations, and the ostomy appliance can be seen as a minor inconvenience.

- Build practical confidence:
1. Master efficient pouch routines and carry only what you need once you're comfortable.
2. Accept that leaks or blowouts might happen occasionally; treat them as minor setbacks.
3. Experienced users suggest changing the pouch on a regular schedule and avoiding heavy meals or beer right before the wear limit.

- Social and intimacy tips:
1. Most partners, friends, and coworkers will adapt. Wearing discreet clothing or using intimacy garments can help ease concerns.
2. Decorate opaque covers to feel more comfortable with your appearance.

- Support your mental health:
1. Connect with other ostomates through forums or local groups instead of facing it alone.
2. If depression persists, consider seeking counseling or professional help.

- Remember that reversals aren't always possible. Relying on the hope of a reversal can be risky, so prepare mentally for permanence and celebrate the life you've saved.

- Life's other challenges, like aging, illness, job loss, or financial stress, can add to your feelings. Try to separate these issues from the ostomy itself.

- Long-term users, some with decades of experience, affirm that you can lead a full, active life. They've enjoyed marriage, parenting, swimming, snorkeling, traveling, working, and attending theater nights.

- See the pouch as a source of freedom, allowing you to choose when to empty it rather than rushing to find a bathroom.

- A common sentiment shared by many is: "It is what it is—make the best of a bad situation and live your life.