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Problem or opportunity

Welcome to MeetAnOstoMate
17,233 Members
Posted: Wed Jul 05, 2017 3:54 pm

Well, it’s probably both but problems jump out at us while we’re not necessarily looking for opportunities. First of all, it is what it is; a problem is a problem and words won’t change that. But the way we accept it, or not, could influence the quality of our lives. Sometimes I can only vaguely remember issues that were so difficult to handle at the time. They’re no longer issues because of whatever I did to eliminate or, at least, significantly mitigate them. Most of the remedies came from you guys and you’ll continue to be there for me and for others. That’s just who your are. So now I try to focus on the opportunity to fix something rather than get disgusted by the problem. I guess it’s just an attitude thing.
Just sayin’
Mike

Posted: Sat Jul 08, 2017 3:05 pm

I agree with you Mike. It all depends on what we do to and how we go about it.

If you get all worked up or upset it doesn't help the situation and sometimes even makes things worse.

Posted: Sun Jul 09, 2017 4:55 am

Hello Mike.

Well said! Thanks for sharing.

Best wishes

Bill

Posted: Mon Jul 10, 2017 4:46 pm

Mike,

 

Good attitude, good response.

 

I've had an ileostomy for 41 years - since I was 18.  At this point,  I can't remember when I didn't.

 

First, I think everyone needs to remember sometimes bad things happen to good people.

Second, generally the alternative to having an ostomy is not very attractive.  In my case it was have the surgery or die.  It's not like we went out and got drunk, or did something else stupid and wound up with an ostomy.  It was a life saving surgery.

Finally, don't be embarrassed. And this is much harder said than done.  But I found when dating if I wasn't embarrassed it made it easier for my partner.  I don't think there's the need for this big long discussion beforehand, just let things develop.  Most people can and do handle it, if they can't, it's likely they can't handle many things. One of the most liberating things I ever did was go to a nude beach in my earlier 20s or when I was comfortable enough to use a gang shower at the gym.

 

Plus, speak up when you hear someone say something salvageable about colostomies.  I was 19 when I heard some one say I'd rather be dead. Over the years, it's disgusting gross or people sometimes make jokes.  I think about all the people who likely die of colon or rectal cancer cause they were afraid of going to the doctor because they were afraid.  We could actually save lives if we'd just speak up and be good examples.

 

MikeQ

 

Posted: Sat Jul 15, 2017 7:07 am

Hi Mike, how true it is what it is..I agree with Bill well said!  Have a great weekend ! Angelica

 

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