Unexpected Mishap at the Doctor's Office

Replies
64
Views
12348
Angelicamarie
Nov 19, 2016 2:53 pm

Good day all, I'm a disabled veteran, so I had an appointment. I'm sitting in the office with the doctor. I had on jeans, a lace blouse, combat boots, and a leather jacket. I felt warm. So I told the doctor I have to get to the bathroom, which was right across the hall from the office. I told the doctor I have leaked and I'm warm all over. She said, "I'll call maintenance." So, in the meantime, I'm in the bathroom—one stall, thank God! So I'm coming out of all my clothing. By me being at the VA, the exchange was open, which is a military store that carries different things like clothes, perfumes, all kinds of things, so my husband went down and bought me a dress. Well, I carry a big bag of supplies: wipes, soap, face cloth, extra pouch, barrier, and ring. I had to keep the jacket and the boots, but that got me out of the bathroom and back to the appointment, which was just about finished. I heard the maintenance man when he went into the bathroom; he hollered, "Oh s--t." I really felt bad for him because I'm sure it wasn't a pretty sight. It's one thing to leak at home, but when you're out in public, it's humiliating. But I survived that day, and that was the second and last episode that happened in public. Have you been there? Angelicamarie

xnine
Nov 19, 2016 4:29 pm

Yes

Angelicamarie
Nov 19, 2016 5:28 pm

Hi xnine, what are you doing out in public?

Gray Logo for MeetAnOstoMate

Why Join MeetAnOstoMate?

This is a remarkable community of 40,873 members.

You will get real advice from fellow ostomates who truly understand you - things you won't find in the books.

And it's not all about ostomy - there is friendship and relationships too.

Privacy is very important - your profile is not visible to the outside world.

  40,873 members

Create Account

Justbreathe

MeetAnOstoMate website turned out to be a lifesaver for me. I say this because, for me, this ostomy journey was a devastating event both physically and mentally.
Here, I found folks who understood my feelings even better than my family or friends could. Only a fellow ostomate can understand how you really feel.

Information sharing is key, as well as support and understanding, to ultimately bring more harmony into our ostomy life journey. I found here, virtually no ostomy questions that are not touched upon. Questions which some might feel, may be too trivial to contact a doctor about or even too shy or embarrassed to ask their own doctor about. They are all addressed here.

For me, anonymity was very helpful in seeking answers to each phase of this life changing medical and mental event. Sharing initial trauma feelings, ongoing support and finally acceptance was what I found with my membership here. I am not sure what my mental and physical attitude would be today without having found this site.

Additional benefits included: finding products and ideas to help with daily maintenance, innovative ideas and as a bonus - some great humor.
After all “laughter IS the best medicine”.

I have been a member for 3 years, an ostomate for 4 years - yes, I certainly wish I would have found it immediately after surgery but so very thankful I finally found it when I did as I truly believe it turned my troubled depression and situation into a more positive attitude and acceptance.

Sincerely,
An Ileostomate nicknamed Justbreathe 🫶🏼

Bill
Nov 19, 2016 8:15 pm

Hello Angelicamarie.

Thanks for sharing your story, which is a useful reminder to many ofd us about the times that we have had embarrassments in public places. When I was wearing bags  I had several such incidents and lived through them to tell the tale later. But the one I tell most was long before my stoma days, when I was incontinent of faeces. It was infinitely harder to keep some sort of control over the problem when it came from my anus , rather than the front of my stomach. I was in a supermarket and wanted access to the disbled toilets but the security guard said i COULDN'T USE IT BECAUSE i HAD NO PROOF THAT i WAS DISABLED.  I tried reasoning with him to the point where it was to late and shit flowed out of the bottom of my trousers and all over the floor. Only then did he allow me into the toilet to clean up, but there was no apology on his part, only a sarcastic comment that I should carry some proof of disability . After that I always carried a card and a RADAR key. But it never happened again because I opted for surgery which meant that I had much more control.

I love these stories as they bind us together as soul-mates.

Best wishes

Bill  

Angelicamarie
Nov 19, 2016 9:17 pm

Wow, Bill, we got through it, but you sure don't forget. Thank you, and you're very right that it does connect us as soulmates. Thank you, Bill. This was after the surgery for me!!! Both times. That's why I'm going to the stoma nurse Monday to learn how to irrigate. After listening to some of my fellow ostomates, if you have more control, I want it. Angelica

 

My Ostomy Journey: Bruce | Hollister

Play
xnine
Nov 19, 2016 9:50 pm

OK Angelica. We were on a car trip. I noticed my bag was part full, but I was too lazy and in a rush to get going to change it. Only a few miles down the road, it exploded. Too big a mess to stop at the side of the road. Stopped at a service station, I wanted one with washroom access on the outside, but no luck. So I am trying to get cleaned up and it erupts again, such a big mess. At least I had clothes in the suitcase. My wife was a big help getting me clothes and stuff and calming me down; I was so mad at that point. Well, lesson learned.

I can almost laugh about it now.

Angelicamarie
Nov 19, 2016 9:56 pm

Xnine, thanks! I wanted to laugh when I heard the maintenance man say "Oh s--t," but I felt bad for him. I thank you for sharing. When it happened, it was horrible. I guess one can laugh later. You made it through that day! Thanks again, Xnine. Have a good weekend! Angelicamarie

 

 

 

NJ Bain
Nov 20, 2016 4:10 am

All,

I'm really finding it disheartening that so many of my fellow ostomates are having to deal with leakage, explosions, and accidents. I don't know what luck I've walked into, but I've rarely, and I mean really rarely, had an accident or leakage that you all are describing. I'm concerned that some of our ostomates, ET nurses, or surgeons are not completely preparing some of you for such outcomes.

I think I've read more posts with ostomates having issues with 2-piece appliances that are having leakage and or accidents. I may be biased since I use a one-piece drainable. It just sounds like so many of us are having issues that they should not have to be dealing with. Please let me know on this forum if I can offer any advice or assistance.

Bain

Angelicamarie
Nov 20, 2016 9:59 am

Good morning, Bain. Then you have been very lucky, because it does happen, but is it the 2 pc or something else? Heck, I'm starting to wonder. Angelica

HarleyDoll
Nov 20, 2016 6:13 pm


I was having the same thoughts as you.  How are these accidents happening?  Like you, I use a one piece drainable, and after reading some of these posts there is no way I want a two piece.  Seems to me the more 'seams' there are, the more possible areas of leakage.  Keep it simple with a one piece and make sure your fit is good, that is key.

ycats
Nov 21, 2016 4:38 pm

You are so strong and have such a great support system in place! I'm sorry that happened to you. It makes me feel that what I go through is nothing. I hope your Sunday was better. I'm off to doctor appointments today... I have that "change" with me
Login to see image

Angelicamarie
Nov 21, 2016 10:52 pm

Thank you for replying to another horrific time. I don't think I'm strong; I'm just trying to make it. I want to live. That's a good thing to do; carry a change. Have a great evening!

LadyHope
Nov 21, 2016 11:09 pm

Hi Angelicamarie, thank you very much for posting your story today of strength, courage, and hope. Having a leak is so scary, and you managed to get through it without skipping a beat. It gives the rest of us (ostomates and friends of) the courage and strength to face these unpredictable challenges. My friend from the support group has leaks often as her stoma is flush with her belly. She has traveled the world and leaked everywhere. Her stories helped me to be less serious and gave me the confidence to travel again. I don't travel the world like she continues to do, but I do get away every now and then. I also have skin concerns once in a while, and it is frustrating because I do everything that the experts say. Keep trying and moving forward, don't give up. Lastly, my friend says... S&%t happens, and sometimes more and sometimes less depending on the day. Take care and thank you again, Angelicamarie, for your story of "grace under pressure." We are not alone in our journey. Sincerely, LadyHope

Angelicamarie
Nov 21, 2016 11:29 pm

Lady Hope, thanks for replying to a horrific time. I'm glad it helped you, but it was really rough when it happened, and yes, I was embarrassed, but I had to get out of those clothes. So, I always have a change in the car because you never know; just have supplies in your purse. I have totes, and I carry quite a bit: wipes, soap, toilet paper, plastic bag, wafer, pouch, ring. Take a chance and venture out a little more. Have a great one, Lady Hope! angelicamarie

Past Member
Nov 22, 2016 4:57 am

Hi, I'm Wendy and new to this site. Yep, I've been there twice at work when it's happened to me. The first time I was in my uniform, and it was just like you said, running everywhere. I was so humiliated; my supervisor had to bring me a new uniform. I had student nurses out of the conference table right next to the bathroom I was in. I was just mortified. The second time wasn't so bad; I caught it early, but I know exactly how you feel. Lucky for me, I work in a hospital, and when I explain to everybody what happened, they're like, "Oh, don't worry about it; we understand," but I still was just mortified. I guess we just have to expect days like that, and when it happens, we just have to move on. Maybe one day we can all look back and laugh at it. Good luck to you.
Login to see image

Bill
Nov 22, 2016 6:35 am

Hello PVassarFan 10.

What mortified me was when I got into difficulties whilst visiting my local hospital. I went into the toilet to clean up and it was hopeless for my needs.

I explained and asked the nurses where I could clean up and they directed me to the basement where there was a sluice for cleaning up soiled bed linen. There was not privacy as it was just a laundry area and by that time I just couldn't care less so I stripped of and washed my clothes anyway. You would think that in a HOSPITAL that actually performed these operations, that there would be suitable toiletting facilities. after that incident I went roud all the toilet areas to see if anything would be more suitable than the sluice. What I found(or did niot find)  really shocked me as even the disabled loos were not designed with us in mind. Okay if you have difficulty getting on and off the loo; okay if you are a mother with child; okay in some of them if you are in  a wheelchair. But nothing very helpful if you need to clean up after a stoma disaster.

It looks as if we will always need to be self-reliant in these situations.

Best wishes

Bill

Angelicamarie
Nov 22, 2016 9:24 am

Bill, thanks so much for responding again to another horrific time. Thank you for sharing again. Have a great day! You inspire me, Bill!!!angelicamarie

Angelicamarie
Nov 22, 2016 9:27 am

Bill, thanks. I think that I had sent you a duplicate reply. Hopefully, this will take care of it. Angelicamarie

Angelicamarie
Nov 22, 2016 9:46 am

Wendy, thanks for sharing (referring to horrific days). It is quite embarrassing, but you made it, and you dealt with it, and your sharing might help someone else. You have a great one. Once again, thanks, AngelicaMarie.

LadyHope
Nov 22, 2016 2:01 pm

Hi Everyone, I agree with you regarding bathroom facilities and how they are not compatible with ostomate emergencies.  I find that I need extra shelving and running water to help out.  One would think that although we are not handicapped, we could use additional appliances available to make ostomy changing less complicated and messy.  Plus, some public bathrooms are terrible....are they ever cleaned?  Thanks again for the thread.  Maybe if we group together as one louder voice, our needs will be heard and our requests met.  Take care and have a happy Tuesday!  LH

Angelicamarie
Nov 22, 2016 2:43 pm

Lady Hope, that's a great idea. One voice is not heard; it almost takes an army. Take care, angelicamarie.

HarleyDoll
Nov 22, 2016 6:42 pm

Not to ruffle any feathers, but it might be worthwhile advocating for some shelving as opposed to new signage on washrooms. Your new president might be quite interested in helping the disabled as opposed to the gender confused. Our washrooms in the hospitals here in Canada are the same. No shelving, and half the time you can't even tell if the door is locked or not, while people wait in line outside. I was in the ER a few days ago; you don't want to know. They have - as you say - no shelving whatsoever, and you are lucky if there is a hook on the back of the door to put your coat or purse. Then they hand you a urine sample too, with a little wipe and a little bottle. Where are you supposed to put that? You have to be a juggler to get this accomplished without having to put your purse on the dirty floors. I also had a 3-day hospital stay in late August. It was an emergency, and I had no chance to plan or change my pouch before I went there. Do you think the hospital had any pouches? Nope. Stuck with a dirty bag all through my testing (major testing), all through the entire stay. The shift changes were so often, and the left hand didn't know what the right hand was doing. All I wanted was a clean bag; I would change it myself, hello??? Well, the hospital does not carry a supply of bags or pouches apparently, so what happened is I had to get the one Ostomy Nurse on the one day she was there to order up from my supplier to deliver to the hospital, and I gave them my credit card to pay for it.

All this, and four stents too (heart attack). You better believe we are on our own up here for the most part. Socialized medicine is not all unicorns and rainbows. Parts are good, other parts are outright dangerous. I finally got my new bags and supplies about three hours before I had to go home (3-4 day hospital stay). But not before there was some kind of carbon monoxide type or gas leak in our hospital room - haha. Oh yeah, homeward bound; I couldn't wait to get home!

Mrs.A
Nov 28, 2016 3:55 am

I keep an empty department store bag in my purse. I put my purse inside it and hang it on the door, or sometimes on the door lock.

Keep a simple but strong S hook which can go over the door to hang your purse. Then you can use the bag for the used ostomy supplies so you can tie it up and toss it when you're done.

Angelicamarie
Nov 28, 2016 6:41 am

Thanks, Mrs. A, for that info. I will try it, and thanks again for replying to another horrific time. Have a good day!

angelicamarie

Past Member
Nov 28, 2016 7:33 pm

Hello friends,

Aaah yes, the totally useless and totally inadequate public facilities. I can see that for women they are even more frustrating.

I on the other hand, enjoy the cosy confines of porta potties scattered along my daily routes. They at least have shelves and

a locking door. From there on things decline rapidly. No water, no heat, and for the most part no light.

I won't bore you with the other delights. Suffice it t

to say, I'll take any inside facility vs. a porta potty or on some "immediate" occasions, a secluded spot along a fire road. Just

me and the wildlife doing our thing. Who ever though that the daily functions would become so challenging.

Adapt and survive, we have opposed thumbs, we can make it!!!

Angelicamarie
Nov 28, 2016 10:40 pm

Thank you, scootertrash. The things we go through, but we'll manage somehow. Thank you for sharing. : angelicamarie

weewee
Nov 29, 2016 5:10 pm

Hello all,

Oh, do I remember all the blowouts I have had in my past due to the way my surgeon left me. In the past, my changes would be up to 3 times a day depending on what I was doing. I had total blowouts at restaurants with friends and family. For 6 years, this is what I dealt with, and all I did was what I had to do, and sometimes that meant me stripping my shirt off and being half-naked so I didn't get it all over my pants; those were some of the easy ones. One time, I got caught really good: went to a restaurant, then tried to go to the store with my friend in his truck, then a major blowout occurred. Then my dear old stoma decided that it was going to be a fest and not stop for a long time. I couldn't do anything but spray the ground and pray I missed my friend's truck because then the wind picked up and was blowing, and when people were driving by, they watched as I made a mess all over the parking lot. By the time my friend got back, I had used all the paper towels, all the baby wipes; my shirt stunk up the whole spot, and he was trying to rush to get me home. The bumps in the parking lot were more noticeable because I didn't want a mess in the truck. My friend was seeing how mad I was getting because I used everything we had in the truck. I have spare backup changes in every car or place I am in, but on this day, I couldn't stop long enough to put another bag on. By the time we got me home, I was finally getting no output. My friend handled it better than me; he was praying that I wouldn't spray on the inside of the truck. I said, "You got your wish," because we made it home in pieces.

Newstom
Nov 29, 2016 6:15 pm

Hi all, well I haven't had a big catastrophe in public, hope I never do. I end up hanging my purse around my neck sometimes to avoid the floor, but that is challenging as well. I wear a belt to hold the snap-on bag to the wafer. I was walking out of the movies with my hubby and I felt something hitting the back of my knees. I finally reached back and it was that white belt flapping way below my jacket like a long tail! I was so embarrassed I just tucked it in my pant waist and kept walking. I guess it wasn't the end of the world, I'd be much more upset if it fell off and I lost it, but I did not look back and was glad I was leaving the theatre, not arriving! It reminded me of having toilet paper hanging out, that's happened a long time ago... but the public bathrooms are not ostomy friendly! One big question: How do you know if you have a hernia and is it bad for you? I have this mound which is sometimes more protruding than others but it is not painful. I have no idea who to ask as my primary doctor seems clueless with the colostomy.

Angelicamarie
Nov 30, 2016 12:22 am

Hello newstrom, thanks for responding to the horrific time. The good part is you were leaving and you didn't have waste falling down your leg. I can't give you any info about hernia, because I don't have one, but on this site there is a wealth of information, and hopefully the ostomate that reaches that has the info will share with you!!!! ANGELICAMARIE

NotDeadYet
Dec 03, 2016 6:34 am


And there you have it... we have supplies in our cars. Extra leggings and top, paper towel roll, Ziplock bags (perhaps gallon-sized?), wet wipes, tissues, a bottle of water, but extra bags only make it to the trunk box if used immediately—who knows how a week in the trunk of a car would compromise that seal! I only carry a purse that can accommodate, in the side-zip-pocket, a colostomy bag, stored in a Ziplock bag, and a small pack of wet wipes.

I am so sorry for guys who can't carry that stuff as women can... Women can carry a complete bag change in the interior zip-pocket of their purse! I can fully open my purse at a checkout stand, and my extra colostomy bag and wipes and Ziplock for disposal are hidden in the side pocket of my purse. Poor men! How could they possibly handle this?